Puppy Day!!

And now introducing.... Sam n' Ella!! :)

(Ella's the white one, so it's a bit backwards here.)

My parents and I took a road trip to Childress, Texas today to pick up my adorable puppies!!  They did great and didn't get carsick on our 3+ hour drive back.  And they slept all through the drive to Tulsa, (worn out after meeting Charlene, Kristin, Georgia, Alan, Reagan, Rylee, Rach, Jace, and Kyndal)!  Mom came back to Tulsa with me, but so far, it's been a pretty easy job.  They really are so little that it's not been hard to clean it up when they go to the bathroom.  Yesterday (12-27-13), I changed a baby's diaper for the first time in all my 29 years.  (Missy K, of course, and it was only wet, so an easy one to start on).  And today was my first time to clean up after the puppies, and I bucked up and did what had to be done. lol

They're sleeping in their crate in my exercise room right now.  They like being in there together, and haven't cried at all.  Miracle. :)

Anywho, here's little Sammy Susa (a nickname I gave her on our way back). lol  Her name is Sam (short for Samantha), but I was calling her Sammy and Sammers, then Sammy-Sue, then Sammy Susa, like Sammy Sosa, the baseball player.  But Sue-sa, because she's a girl.  So that's the long history of the nickname.  Feel free to call her whatever you want along those lines. :)

She's so adventurous and playful, just exploring everything and chewing my fingers and sweater!  She's a fluffy little bundle of fun! :)

Miss Ellie May, on the other hand, is a little more timid.  She wasn't sure about getting out of the crate at first, and she's cried a few times, probably missing her mom (that's the story in my head, at least).  She likes to be held more than Sammers, but she can be pretty playful too.  It's so hilarious to watch them run around and jump and play!!  Looooove it!

We (Mom and I - Mom's here to help for the first couple days) put out the "pee pads" to see if they would go on them... here's how that worked out:

Lol Sammy Susa brought it right back into their crate and they chewed on it for a bit.  Awesome.

Ella Belle chewing my fingers.  Ummmm, tiny puppy teeth are shockingly SHARP, just FYI.

Cutest thing EVER - we got them these squeaky tennis balls to play with, but they're a little too big for their little mouths, so watching them try to carry them is just precious!

Trying to replicate their cute red blanket photo:

It didn't quite work out, but how cute are they!?

Timid Ellie May and Playful Sammy Sue... Sam n' Ella!!

YAY!!  Happy Puppy Day! :) 

Cold Tangerines

Kelly loaned me her Shauna Niequist book, Cold Tangerines, and I finished it over the break this week.  Loved it!!  It was autobiographical short essays, but I love the way she writes and much of what she said resonated with me.  My spirit (the Holy Spirit inside me) is bursting with hope and joy, ready to celebrate my life and the fresh start I've been given and live each day to the fullest!  The following segments really stuck out to me, so I wanted to preserve them here:

On Friendship:
"Friendship is acting out God's love for people in tangible ways.  We were made to represent the love of God in each other's lives, so that each person we walk through life with has a more profound sense of God's love for them.  Friendship is an opportunity to act on God's behalf in the lives of the people that we're close to, reminding each other who God is... True friendship is a sacred, important thing, and it happens when we drop down into that deeper level of who we are, when we cross over into the broken, fragile part of ourselves... We have to overcome the fear that when they see the depths of who we are, they'll leave.  But what we give up is nothing in comparison to what this kind of friendship gives to us.  Friendship is about risk.  Love is about risk.  If we can control it and manage it and manufacture it, then it's something else, but if it's really love, really friendship, it's a little scary around the edges."

On Weight:
"What I wanted more than anything was to not have a body.  This body that I dragged around had been my enemy for so long and had betrayed me so deeply, over and over, by having the audacity to be fat.  I hated it, the particular and venomous way you hate someone you used to love, someone who was supposed to be on your side and wasn't, and who was in fact, fighting against you... I felt like my body was inaccurate in its representation of me, and that made me furious with it."

"For two decades, I believed that if I could just get this one thing under control, then the whole of my life would magically bloom like a perfect, lush flower... But what I found is that there is no such thing as skinny enough.  There is no magic number that can make you feel safe or protected or confident."

On Writing:
"I get stuck because I try to map out every dip and turn, try to write an ending, literally and figuratively, before a beginning even exists.  So I don't write, but with the energy that I could use on writing, I worry instead."

"Writing is about choosing the one narrow thing and following it as far as it will take me, instead of chasing all the snaps and crackles in my head."

"Please keep believing that life can be better, brighter, broader, because of the art that you make.  Please keep demonstrating the courage that it takes to swim upstream in a world that prefers putting away for retirement to putting pen to paper, that chooses practicality over poetry, that values you more for going to the gym than going to the deepest places in your soul.  Please keep making art for people like me, people who need the magic and imagination and honesty of great art to make the day-to-day world a little more bearable."

On Loss:
"Looking back, I can see much more clearly what was happening, what had gone bad without my realizing it, what I added to an already difficult situation.  If I had been savvier and more aware, I would have resigned sooner.  For a lot of reasons that I only understand now, I did the opposite: I tried and tried and tried to make something work that had stopped working a long time before I tried to salvage it.  And I left, in the end, because I had no other choice... What it felt like to me was heartbreak.  I felt like something unraveled around me.  I felt more vulnerable and powerless than I had in a decade.  I didn't recognize myself in the mirror... I lost it, whatever it is.  I lost that sense that I was okay, and that I would be okay again.  I lost all belief in my future.  I was sad and scared and ashamed.  Without knowing it, without intending to, I had shoved way too much of myself into my job, more than a job can possibly bear, and I set myself up to fall a terrible distance if something were ever to happen to that job.  And then, of course, it did.  I put all my eggs in the job basket, until it became impossibly heavy, and it broke... And it's not anyone's fault but my own.  It's my fault for trying to find a shortcut, knowing full well that true spiritual depth and actual confidence have no substitutes."

On Fragility:
"I wanted to be productive and useful and focused, and I turned into someone who was frazzled and scattered, and who could not bear the emotional weight of her own life, let alone someone else's.  I don't want to be that person.  And I'm ashamed that I let myself move so far from who I wanted to be... The bottom just falls out sometimes, and nobody is exempt.  Everything is not okay.  And one of the most sacred gifts we can offer before God is the willingness to make a bed on a couch or make a phone call or make a meal or make a sacrifice for someone we care about."

"But the only person who decided my life had turned to dust was me.  The only person who is still deeply troubled about what I've lost, even in the face of what I've gained, is me.  I would never have wanted it this way, but something bright and beautiful has been given to me, and I'm in grave danger of losing it, squandering it, becoming a person who cannot find the goodness that's right in front of her because of the sadness that she chooses to let obscure it... When you can invest yourself deeply and unremittingly in the life that surrounds you instead of declaring yourself out of the game once and for all because what's happened to you is too bad, too deep, too ugly for anyone to expect you to move on from, that's a good, rich place.  More often than not, there is something just past the heartbreak, just past the curse, just past the despair, and that thing is beautiful.  You don't want it to be beautiful, at first.  You want to stay in the pain and the blackness because it feels familiar, and because you're not done feeling victimized and smashed up. But one day you'll wake up surprised and humbled, staring at something you thought for sure was a curse and has revealed itself to be a blessing."

"I think babies really do make you believe in God.  They make you believe in God because there's something just beyond understanding about their freshness and fragility and their smell and their toes." :)

(Presh Missy K)

On Forgiveness:
"Crazy mad is always covering over hurt and fear, so if we're telling the whole truth here, she hurt me, and she made me feel scared.  And that's worse than just making me mad.  I felt small and scared and out of control, and I felt like my friend was making decision after decision to hurt me.  Every time I heard from her or about her, it hurt.  It was like there was sharp glass on her hands, and every time she got near me, she cut me, even if she swore she didn't mean to... I kept thinking about her, and the anger and venom were starting to feel familiar.  The pain has softened ever so slightly, but it still seems like she did something wrong.  How do I forgive someone who doesn't think she did anything wrong?  Or who doesn't care?  ...My friend is doing great, I think, but I stagger around in a fog of anger and clenched jaws and fists, waiting for a showdown that will never come and an apology that will never be offered.  So I let her off the hook... It was like a full-time job, forgiving her over and over, with each new angry thought or bad conversation, but it was good work... I keep letting her off the hook, because when I do, I can breathe again."

On Gratefulness:
"Thank you, God, for the things you heal, the things you redeem, the things you refuse to leave just as they have been for what seems like forever."

"Everything is interim.  Everything is a path or a preparation for the next thing, and we never know what the next thing is... I want to arrive.  I want to get to wherever I'm going and stay there.  That's why I was such a ferocious planner of my life.  But I'm learning to just keep moving, keep walking.  We won't arrive.  But we can become.  And that's the most hopeful thing I can think of.  Thank God I was wrong about everything I had planned.  Thank God we weren't on my schedule... Now when I think about the future, I try to write in pencil."

"I am thankful for the breaking of things that needed to be broken, that couldn't have been broken any other way, thankful for the severing that allowed me to fall all the way down to the center of my fear and look it in the face, thankful for being set free from something I didn't even know I was enslaved to.  There is a quality in my life that I sense now, like a rumbling bass line or thunder far away, and the only phrase I can find to capture it is that it is the feeling of having nothing to lose.  I have nothing left to lose.  Because I was embarrassed and ashamed in such a deep way, and to my surprise, I'm still here.  I'm happy in a new way, free in a new way."

"We held hands and thanked God for the darkness, and for the way the darkness had become light, and in that moment, we practiced thanksgiving... for the uncomplicated happiness of babies and friendships and food, and for the very complicated joys that come from loss, from failure, from reaching the bottom and pushing back up to the light!"

"I believe in a life of celebration.  I believe that the world we wake up to every day is filled to the brim with deep aching love, and also with hatred and sadness.  And I know which one of those I want to win in the end... I have to remind myself that it is good.  I have to create hope in my life, because there's something inside me that has radar for the bad parts of life.  I just don't want to live in only that reality.  Because there is another reality.  A better one.  Hope and redemption and change are real, and they're happening all around me... Life is painful, and we carry with us so much disappointment and heartbreak.  But I'm fighting to save some space inside me where I can create hope.  I can't live there in the disappointment anymore.  I've missed whole seasons of my life.  I look back and all I remember is pain... I wasted a lot of time wishing I was different.  I didn't love the gift of life because I was too busy being angry about the life I was given.  I wanted it to be different.  But being angry didn't change things.  It just wasted time.  Today is a gift.  And if we have tomorrow, tomorrow will be a gift.  It's rebellious in a way to choose joy, to choose to dance, to choose to love your life.  It's much easier and much more common to be miserable.  But I choose to do what I can do to create hope, to celebrate life, and the act of celebrating connects me back to that life I love...  Let's echo His words and let our lives speak those words:  It is good!"

Christmas 2013

Christmas Eve = family dinner with Mom's side of the family at Santa Fe (one of few places open Christmas Eve), then we all went back to Rach's to open presents!  It was a hassle to get a table all together, but thanks to Mom, it all worked out! :)  After opening presents at Rach's and playing with the kids a bit, we came back home and ate chocolate cake, and I read for a bit before bed.  All things considered, 2013 is ending on a good note.  This has been the best Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, and Christmas I've had in a while!!

 Me and Mini-Miss on her first Christmas Eve!  Please note her adorable snowman outfit. :)

And her stylish hot pink baby Tom's - precious!! :)

Jace-man loves his "Grandad!"  (Really his great-grandad, but he calls him "Grandad" and Dad "grandpa," which he pronounces "Bampaw." lol)

Pretending to golf at Santa Fe!  I love Rach and Grandad's smiles in the background. :)

His expression here = awesomeness.  And his mouth is covered in chocolate and he's wearing Grandad's cap - all funny! :)

T-man and Carter Lee in their awesome new Christmas hats from Aunt Lindsey (you squeeze them and the ears flap up)! ...That plus "millions and millions of candies" was my present for them! :)

The Parrish Fam on Christmas Eve 2013!

Jace and his great-grandparents, all looking so happy! :)

Rach screamed while reading a book to him and he loved it, so screaming and trying to get his mom to scream is another favorite thing of his right now. lol  That's what's happening here, as the rest of us were trying hard to get him to smile. :)  I do love them both in their cozy cuddly "Christmas jammies!"

Grandpa and the kids (sporting his awesome rainbow loom bracelets from T&C - I got one too - best present ever)! =)

Now we're transitioning to Christmas Day!!

Here's Missy K on her first Christmas morning, just being a little presh!

Rach said she's always really happy in the mornings - love it. :)

We had a tasty pancakes and biscuits breakfast at the Parrishes this morning, and Rach gave me a card that I loved!  Then we went to see Grudge Match at Penn with Charlene (and ran into the Wallaces there - yay)!  Then we hung out at home for a bit before going to the Peavler's at 5:30 for the big family Christmas dinner!

Georgia, Nancy, and Charlene getting things ready in the kitchen.  

They were all very excited to hear about my puppies! :)

The best sugar cookies everrrr (made by Georgia)!  =)

Rach and Dad looking back through Nancy's old Christmas scrapbooks (not even a posed candid - it's really candid, and I love it)!

Ahh, memories of the braces years - yikes! lol

Bubby Jace and "Mamaw!"  Love this one too!! :)

(Jace was sick earlier and seemed to be getting sick again through the night :( so Rach & Co. ended up leaving right after dinner.)

Christmas dinner - the rolls, potatoes, and Mom's broccoli-cheese casserole were my favorite things, naturally!!  (Nancy got KFC chicken strips yesterday to heat up for Rach and I bc she knew we wouldn't eat ham... so nice!)

Black and white sister pic (since I didn't dress in Christmasy colors)! =)

I sat by Kristin at dinner and we talked a bit about Anthony and about her current pregnancy.  She asked if I might be willing to take maternity pictures for her in a few months, and I felt honored by that request.  She also said that she really appreciated my cards and bringing him up and letting them know Anthony has not been forgotten.  Even with all the fun and food and merriment surrounding us, that quiet conversation was probably my favorite part of the night.

So that's the recap. :)

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Phone Pictures!

Here are some recent pics from my iphone...

SNOW DAY! =)

 It made the Christmas display Mom and Rach made for me even prettier! 

A dozen roses delivered to work from Babah and Grandad for my SNU Graduation 
(since we didn't get to go because of bad roads). ❤

Seeing The Nutcracker with the girls - me, Talhia, Lindsay, and Linda!  We chose the cheapest tickets and somehow ended up with front row seats that were awesome!  Apparently snobby theater folk don't consider those good seats?  We had dinner at Charleston's before the play, then had to run in the rain and barely made it in time - they shut the doors at 7:02.  All in all, a fun and memorable night!!

The final bow. :)  The dancing was great, but as usual, the male ballet costumes were disturbingly revealing. lol

Writing Christmas cards - I found this card by T-Swift so that made me happy! :)

Ice Storm - the roads were totally fine, but there was ice thickly covering all the branches!

Rach and T-man at All American Diner for Sunday lunch!  He so badly wanted to order whatever she was eating and drinking.  He's so precious! :)

Recent quotes by T-man:

"Lindsey, you can be my green beans and Rachael can be my broccoli.  Carter, you can be my mashed potatoes, and I'll throw you away!" lol   

The natural sibling rivalry cracks me up, as does the fact that he loves green beans and broccoli but hates mashed potatoes.  What on earth!?

"Every time I see your face in the morning, it surprises me!"  -to Rach because he's used to seeing her with makeup! lololol  Love it!!

"Where do you go to church?"  -Tman

"We actually don't go to church right now."  -Uncle

"Why not?  Do you already know everything about God or somethin'?"

(Totally innocent, but really funny!!  Or probably awkward, if I'd been there in person.)

Jace-Man being a super-cool Thunder fan! lol

Jace-in-the-Box, 2012 and 2013. lol  I still love that pic from last Christmas - he just crawled in there then looked back at me.  And yesterday, he got in the box to be tall enough to reach his golf ball, so I snapped a picture really quickly! :)  He is OBSESSED with golf lately - he wants to watch it on TV and he makes everything (toothbrush, hairbrush, paper towel roll, etc.) a golf club.  He makes sure everyone is paying attention and "ready?" then takes a swing and we all cheer.  I'm hoping that game gets less exciting soon. lol

The stool we made to go in JB's classroom at Deer Creek! =)  It turned out really cute!

Little miss Missy K in one of her Christmas outfits.  I love love love her big eyes and calm spirit.  So so sweet!

Me and Missy, snuggling while Mom and Rach finished up the glitter on the stool!

Merry Christmas Eve!!

Memory Monday? (JEM's Request)

This one is for Jeffrey, who texted me this yesterday while in NYC:  
"Please make a blog about our trip"
"Memory Monday"
"...it's fun Pete"
"Mossy"

Ummm, a bit of an odd request, since I didn't go on this particular trip. LOL
My mom and I got really cracked up by that text. :)

So anyway, here is today's Memory Monday post... courtesy of Kelly's FB photos and the pics and stories Jeff and Chet have texted me along the way.....

Jeff and Chet decided a while back to surprise the girls with a trip to New York City at Christmastime!  They planned it all out and made sure it was on a weekend that would work for everyone.  They let Kelly and Karli find out by unwrapping their tickets to see Wicked on Broadway!  =)  An awesome, generous gift that I know the girls were excited about!  So the "Fab Four" (what I'm calling them for this post) headed to NYC from December 21-23!

First and most importantly, the guys text me these two pics of them at a store with a Boo display! lol  Made me happy!

Love it!

Here's Kelly Marie and Karli Marie, looking precious while shopping at the flower market! :)

JEM posing for a Glamour Shots pic in Central Park - another shot that made me very happy! :)

Chettles repping Oklahoma in Times Square!

A massive and delicious Saluggi's NY-style pizza for "Jelly"...

And plenty for "Charli" too! :)  (This looks really good!  Kelly says it was at a place near the World Trade Center - so I'm guessing they saw the memorial also.?)

Dressed up to go see Wicked on Broadway - (which I'm guessing was fun and awesome, based on seeing it a few years ago in Kansas.)

A great pic of the fab four on Bow Bridge in Central Park - aka my favorite place in all of New York!! :)

Times Square pic on their first night there (I think)!  Cuteness - and Kelly's red scarf and Chet's green shirt make it seem Christmasy. :)

Jeff and Kelly looking wonderfully happy and cute!  I love the giant red ornaments.  (Seriously, NYC on mute would be a lot of fun to me.  The aggressive honking and yelling noises are just too overstimulating for my introvert self.)

And here they are on their first cab ride in NYC, Jeff riding shotgun, as per usual. :)  Hopefully their cab driver didn't flip anyone off this time (ahh, memories).

All in all, the fab four had a wonderful time in NYC!  (I think - very excited to get full details and more stories and pictures later. lol)  Per Chet Lee, the hotel room they stayed in was "significantly better" than the "quaint" hotel where we stayed on our 2010 trip.   While we were suffering through an ice storm here in Oklahoma, it was warm "tshirt weather" in NYC!  They went to Magnolias cupcakes on their first night in town - yum!  (I'm guessing they were good.)  Jeff says they watched a lady on a motor scooter try to run up onto the sidewalk and she nearly threw herself out of it.  The guys were good Samaritans and helped her get on the sidewalk, but they couldn't stop laughing. lol  I can picture that and it made me laugh too!  Last night, they went to a restaurant where the wait staff sang, which is always a fun time. =)  Then they flew back into Tulsa around 9pm tonight!  

...Yep, that's all I got for now.  =)

Happy Memory Monday, JEM! ;-)
And Happy Christmas Eve Eve, friends!!