You do care.

“I DON'T CARE!" Harry yelled at them, snatching up a lunascope and throwing it into the fireplace. "I'VE HAD ENOUGH, I'VE SEEN ENOUGH, I WANT OUT! I WANT IT TO END. I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!"

"You do care," said Dumbledore. He had not flinched or made a single move to stop Harry demolishing his office. His expression was calm, almost detached. "You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.” 

Brilliant.  That quote gets me every time I read it - I hear it so personally.

I definitely have the escape tendency and feel this on a regular basis, but I think we all have times when we're under so much pressure or dealing with such intense pain that we just want out - anywhere but here!  We try to cope by convincing ourselves (and sometimes others) that we just don't care anymore.  But if we are honest, we realize that we are absolutely terrified that the pain will overwhelm us if we let ourselves go there.  

Especially because of their relationship, I love the gentle confrontational honesty in Dumbledore's words - it's enough to take my breath away and make me cry.  Really, I think God says something very similar to me when I feign indifference and pretend not to care about the pain of a major loss, or about certain long-held hopes.  I can throw an emotional fit and make a real mess of things just to avoid feeling sad, firmly claiming, "I'm over it; I don't even care."  And Jesus would just stand there calmly... and lovingly say, "No, Lindz, you do care - you care so much that you're terrified to face it - (but your fear is not coming from Me)."  

This is part of what makes keeping a soft heart so difficult.  Because living in this world with a heart that is alive and open and hope-filled truly is scary.  Regular day-to-day disappointments can be arduous, and grief in the big things is "bleed-to-death" painful sometimes.  So much of the world is numbed out these days, and it becomes very comforting to know that we are not alone.  That God cares about everything that hurts us, and He will protect us through our pain if we turn out hearts to Him instead of shutting them down...  I'm working on that.  And on being honest about it when I DO CARE.  And on remembering how this story ends - that totally victory and redemption are coming, one way or another!