February 2021

 QUOTE OF THE MONTH:

"You will be scattered... and I will be left all alone.

But I am not really alone because the Father is with Me.

I have told you this so that you will have peace

by being united to Me."  

~Jesus, John 16:32-33 ❤❤

FEBRUARY GRATITUDE LIST

• Celebrating so many wonderful birthdays, including my own!
  
• Feeling loved and celebrated by the gifts, food, posts, texts, calls, etc. from friends and family!!
• Annie and Eddie Keep Talking -- by far my favorite light and entertaining podcast! =)
• Peloton:  Hitting 200 strength workouts (total, not just this month), and doing my 250th ride on my birthday!
• A surprise visit from the Wilson fam on my birthday eve!
• Feeling encouraged and seen/supported/understood in my bday dinner chat with Kristin and in my after-work chat with Laura
  
• A fun girls night (dinner + dessert + Harry Potter game) with Tara and Laura
  

What was life-draining this month?

• The historical stint of crazy-cold weather (several days of freezing temperatures, dripping faucets, dangerous ice, and lots of snow)
• The isolation and excessive screen time that came along with being iced in or snowed in
  
• A male stranger sending an inappropriate group message soliciting girls to join him on another site where they could exchange photos in an online kids game I was playing with my 7-year-old niece - ugh, disturbing and frustrating - yet not as surprising as it should be.
  

What was life-giving this month?

• Daily Pause app meditations (giving everyone and everything to God; dwelling on God's goodness, power, and wisdom)
• Listening to the gospels audio while getting ready for work
• Cooking chili and baking Grandad's cookies
• Letting myself feel the amplified emotions - crying more than usual, but also feeling deeper gratitude and joy
• Quality time with family after the snowstorm
  
• Judge saying we are going to be moving back to more in-person hearings (rather than video dockets - happy news for us all!)
  
• Focusing on building up my inner and outer strength + becoming more secure in my attachment style
  
• Joining the "Peloton HardCORE" strength group and following their calendar of assigned classes this month - super helpful, and keeps the sense of community going strong for me!
  
• Choosing love and courage repeatedly; feeling genuinely proud of who I'm becoming
  
• My entire Gratitude List above! ❤

HAPPY LISTS

I Read:  Defiant Joy by Stasi Eldredge, blogs and Facebook posts

I Listened To:  Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John (GNT) on the Bible App. 
Three Audiobooks:  Share Your Stuff. I'll Go First. by Laura Tremaine, The Beauty of What Remains by Steve Leder, and Women of the Word by Jen Wilkin.
The 10 podcasts mentioned in January!

I Watched:  The Last Dance and Taylor Swift's Reputation concert on Netflix; Hamilton, National Treasure, The Last Jedi, Avengers: Endgame, and Folklore recording sessions on Disney+

I Made:  A family portrait drawing for Lindsay ❤

*This recap was inspired by Emily Freeman's The Next Right Thing Journal, writing one each month of 2021!

37

"But we do not belong to those who shrink back and are destroyed, but to those who have faith and are saved."  ~Hebrews 10:39

Read that yesterday, and it's my verse for this week.  Bold faith over shrinking back - yes, please!  It goes along with my 2021 focus on cultivating God-given power, love, and a sound mind over giving in to fear!! ❤  God is with us and for us, and we can do hard things, friends!

Anyway, this post is a recap of celebrating my 37th birthday with the fam this weekend.  Before I get into the pictures and stories, I will say it's pretty surreal that today has literally been the hottest day of 2021 thus far (a delightful 75-degree day), and just one short week ago (on my birthday), most workplaces were closed and we were snowed in with below-freezing temperatures!!  #oklahomalife

Okay, so this = a lovely card made by Rachael that the kids all signed! ❤

I drove to MWC on Friday night and had a spaghetti dinner with the fam!  Miss K had made us placecards, and this was mine (next to her, of course).  Love it!!  She did such a great job drawing Olaf!

This sunflower named Kate was Mom's. =) My Aunt Charlene also joined us for dinner (in this pic behind Mom), and seeing her is always a treat!

K-Faith also made me this card + drawing of us with a butterfly. lol  LLLLove it, and love her!

Lots of gorgeously decorated sugary goodness... Rach got the cookies and cupcakes from OKC Sweets (Friday night) and JB and Emily brought the cookies from Eileens on Saturday!

Mom talking to Carter behind the menu about how they should go TP his girlfriend's house some night. lolol  (Her dad is a former lineman for OU football, so Carter was not excited about doing anything that might upset him. lol)  All of this made me laugh!

 

 

If the above menu didn't clarify it, we had our family lunch at Oliveto - their chicken parmesan is awesome!  JoBug and Emily joined us, and it was fun and good times!

Dad and Rach on the other side of the table (along with Mom and Carter, who sat across from me and Tman).

 

 

Mom also got me a card and had the kids sign it... they said basically the same thing in both of them, but I loved Jace's mistake and clarification here, so I'm including this one! lol

Later that day, me and the kids played several rounds of Sardines (reverse hide and go seek where one person hides and everyone who finds them quietly hides with them one by one, then the last person to find the group is "it" and hides the next round).  It was super fun... here we are following Carter's plan and tricking Jace by coming back into the craft room where we counted. 

Lol at Kyndal under the desk - that caught me off guard in this pic.

It took Jace a while to find us, so everyone got in random positions.  Here's me on the floor with K while T-man stood up on the cabinet! lol

*Triston also gave me the essay/letter he'd written about me, and it was the very best... I love it, and I love him and his siblings, and it means a lot to me to know that something I'm doing is making a real difference in their lives!!

And here's Jace finally finding us! lol  So cute!!

 

 

I met Kristin for dinner at Olive Garden Saturday night!  We had a great talk catching up on all of life, and she bought my dinner and brought me a Nothing Bundt Cake dessert - yum!!  *Highly recommend their new stuffed ziti frita appetizer... and the breadsticks and the chicken and gnocchi soup... and most everything else I've ever tried there! lol

I went back and forth about driving home late Saturday night - you'll notice I only brought the one hoodie because I was expecting a shorter stay, but I opted to stay one more day since my game night with the Wilsons and Fultons was postponed again... it was a good choice!  Sunday was MWC LifeChurch then Ted's lunch then Sardines and volleyball with the kids... and I still got home before 5 and got some Peloton time in!

I'm thankful for this birthday and for the big and small things that have made it special.  I'm grateful for getting some wonderful cards, lots of tasty Italian and Mexican food and sugary goodness, and most of all, quality time with many of the people I love!!

 I figure life's a gift, and I don't intend on wasting it.  You never know what hand you're gonna get dealt next.  You learn to take life as it comes at you, to make each day count.

.....What movie?  If you don't know, then are we even friends!? lol

 

 

 Okay I'm done now. ;-)

Highs and Lows

Happy Friday, friends!

Well, happy-ish at least.  I'm actually taking a quick break from writing a card to Babah because I just started thinking about her and all she's been through the past two years... (the months of diligent caretaking and watching him suffer followed by the loss of her husband of 65 years - with her misdiagnosed awful shoulder injury and surgery in the midst of all that, then trying to adjust to living alone while being diagnosed with macular degeneration and having vision troubles in the midst of a crazy worldwide pandemic, falling and breaking her sacrum, dealing with a lot of confusion brought on by a sepsis infection, a terrible and lonely stay at a nursing home that was supposed to provide rehab but failed to get her up for over a week, and now being confined to a hospital bed at Virginia's with sores on her feet that mean she's still unable to walk even to the bathroom - it's too much - and now they're snowed in and there was some sort of damage to the roads near Virginia's house, so we are unable to go visit this weekend.  Pulling back - I'm super thankful she's with good friends who have been taking care of her, but I know she's had some moments of real despair, and I just feel tired of all this on her behalf.  I always think of her and Grandad on my birthday, which was their anniversary.  And this thought spiral leads me into feeling empathy for other aging adults who are dealing with much greater isolation through this pandemic and how I want them to feel loved and seen and important - I want God to be very close to them!)  Anyway, while writing "I love you very much" on the card, I started full-on crying at my desk, so I had to put that down for a minute and pull myself together.  And redo the makeup real fast! lol  Eek.

Sorry for the heightened emotional intensity lately - I'm guessing that's not the content you were expecting when you saw a picture of awesome cupcakes and cookies! lol  Everything just feels amplified right now - the highs and the lows - and I know that feeling extra is better than being numb, so I'm letting myself feel it all.  Speaking of highs, now we'll move on to much lighter and happier topics... I got a fun and delicious DoorDash birthday gift from Jeff and Kelly yesterday -- YUM!!  So much celebratory goodness from Merritt's Bakery - definitely still working my way through it and may have to share some... but maybe not! ;-)

 

 

  I made this collage then felt like I needed to post the bigger version of the food pic for you to get the full effect. lol  Thanks, Moss fam!  I love and appreciate you guys!!

In other news, I've started watching The Last Dance again.  Not sure what it is with me, but 75% of the time, I'd prefer to watch a rerun to trying something new.  I'm a big fan of what's familiar, I guess.  Anyway, for the second time, Jerry Krause is a selfish moron who should never have been in a position of power.  And MJ was a one of a kind talent with a fierce competitive drive that's so impressive to me!  JoBug reminded me that I share a birthday with him - yay for that!  Happy birth-week to Michael!!  

This pic from the Olympic "Dream Team" makes me happy!

 

 

"For a few weeks, I started each morning by writing, 'What do I actually want?' at the top of a blank page.  It's surprising how useful it is to keep asking the same question.  Each time, my answer became more precise.  Once I knew what I wanted, I turned it into action steps."  

~James Clear (author of Atomic Habits)

So back to Jeff's goals question, I always have mini-goals and little monthly things, but when I think about the big picture of the life I want to work with God to create for myself here on earth, I am quite honestly drawing a blank lately.  I don't know what to do or how to make the most of my time, but I know changing nothing is the wrong answer.  The above quote was encouraging to me -- I really need more clarity here because it's hard to step out and pursue anything when the desire itself is uncertain and muddled.  I don't want to be halfhearted in any big life change.  So my March goal = praying and then journaling (privately) about this subject for 10-20 minutes a day!  WHAT DO I ACTUALLY WANT!?  And if it leads me to any big revelations, I'll share that here. =)

Anywho, I'm headed to see the fam and celebrate with them this weekend. Super excited about that!

Hope you have a wonderful weekend ahead of you!! ❤

Snowy Birthday Recap!

Starting this post off with a cheesy dramatic "All by Myself" snow day pose (going for the Joey by the rain machine in Friends look, as suggested by Chet Lee). lol

While I did spend my actual birthday snowed in in the cozy comfort of my home, I had a lovely surprise (well, 10-minutes notice, which is always appreciated) visit from the Wilson fam on Tuesday, my birthday eve!  Yay, friends!!!

We got a fun snow day pic without actually stepping out the back door. lol

They brought me some birthday macaroons - yum - surprisingly, the raspberry and lemon were my favorites!

When they left, I decided I might as well make the treck down the driveway and check my mail!  I had a cute new dress that I'd ordered a while back, and this lovely surprise gift from Elizabeth!!  How fun is this photo giftbox!?

Still love this meme and think it's a good reminder - this lingering pandemic and the isolating weather have been emotionally hard for so many people, myself included - when you're hurting, a bit of kindness goes a long way!  I want to remember that and be kind... and I want to say I'm super thankful for the many friends and family members who came through on making my birthday special!!

Elizabeth joined me (and 30,000 others) for Cody's comeback ride on Tuesday night!  Then I did my 250th ride (and 777th workout) on my 37th birthday!!  No shoutout, but it was fun and I was proud of myself! =)

Laura called to say Happy Birthday, and we talked for a while about the latest life and work craziness!

After the ride, I joined some friends for a Zoom call set up by the Wilsons... which started off with them singing Happy Birthday as soon as I logged in! =)  It was fun to see everyone, although I look forward to seeing them in person, too!!  My brain was in a foggy place and I drew a blank when Jeff asked thoughtful questions about my goals for the year ahead... eeek, who knows!? lol  More on that in tomorrow's post!  Anyway, hooray for the Wilsons, Moss fam, Young fam, Fultons, and Shoemakers!

Rach called, and I got to chat with each of the kids for a few minutes on FaceTime (the cat filter is the Miss K -- "I'm here live; I'm not a cat!" lol).  They each individually told me about their sledding adventures that afternoon. lol  It was fun to chat with them!

Another thing that made me happy was this ice cream.  If you haven't tried this flavor, do yourself a favor and buy some!!  It's the best.  I ended my birthday evening eating ice cream and finishing Avengers: Endgame, which I watched off and on through the day - the circles part at the end will always make me tear up - so freaking good!

And that brings us to today... the sun is coming in strong, and once I got out of my snow-covered neighborhood this morning, the roads were all delightfully clear!  They did a great job shoveling our parking lot, as well.  The fountain is cracking me up, though... an awkward monument of sad ice blobs covered with snow...

And finally, here's this adorable birthday song from Tate that Chet texted after the Zoom call! ❤  Love it!!  He also sang it when they were at my house the day before... and both times, he said the "dear Lindsey" part twice! ❤ I like how he takes his time to focus and think of the words... and it always delights my soul when kids feel proud and happy and clap for themselves... actually, we should all do that more often!! lol

Thanks for the FB posts, calls, texts, gifts, visits, etc.  I felt loved and celebrated, and it was as good as one could hope for a snowed-in birthday extravaganza!

Happy Valentine's Day!

  Happy snow-covered Valentine's Day, friends and fam!! ❤

Here's a fun pic of my sweet little niece holding the huge card at Walmart... cuteness!!

And in the crazy random department, Happy 30TH Anniversary to Uncle Jesse and Aunt Becky from Full House, married Valentine's Day 1991!! lol  So crazy that it's been that long.  I'm still a fan of Full House in all its cheesiness!

 

 

I got up early (and by early I of course mean 9:30) to join the #BooCrew for a group workout to an XOXO Cody ride from a previous Valentine's Day... so fun listening to his commentary and strong opinions on life and relationships! =)

 

 

It makes me happy that this feels much more like a fun activity than a chore to me!

In stark contrast, I did 90 minutes with Peloton cycling, strength, and yoga this morning... then spent the remainder of the day in super-lounging mode.  I watched T-Swift's concert on Netflix, and then her Folklore recording sessions on Disney+.  And I had a tasty baked potato and watched the off-and-on snowfall from the comfort of my recliner in a cozy blanket.  It was a pretty good day all around... the sunshine mood boost from yesterday was helpful!

Just a friendly reminder that Valentine's Day is not exclusive to couples - it's about celebrating all the people we love, so I'm thankful for you, friends and family!  And thankful for God's unfailing love that sustains and strengthens us!

I hope you are doing well, and I hope you feel loved and valued today. ❤  If not, have grace for yourself and trust that you ARE loved and valued by God, even if you're not feeling it.  He has a purpose in every season and has good things in store for you.  Your life has great value, and your heart matters to Him!!

Here Comes the Sun!

What a gift to my heart today has been. ❤

Seriously, I'm an introverty introvert who loves winter and snow and enjoys my alone time more than most people, but I hadn't seen anyone or been out of my house since Tuesday night, and my assumption that I would be "iced in" or snowed in without human company through my birthday was making me feel a bit sad and lonely and stir crazy, probably just extreme pandemic fatigue and weariness.  Today was a perfect break in that.  So now I can joyfully sing, "Let it snow!" ;-)

When I woke up and saw the happy sunshine (my word for 2021 - yes, please! - it did good things for my soul today) and I saw that my driveway looked really clear on the cameras, I was so surprised.  I was finally able to go get my mail and bring my trash can back into the garage, and it was very evident that despite the continued freezing temps, the sun had melted all the ice off the neighborhood streets and my steep driveway would not be a problem for today... huzzah!  I ordered some nachos from Chuy's to-go for lunch, and I was so full of joy just to drive and be out of the house and see other people!  I put on the Beatles Here Comes the Sun because I'm cheesy and dramatic like that.  "I feel that ice is slowly melting.  Here comes the sun - it feels like years since it's been clear." lolol  Love the metaphor there, and loved the real thing today!

Then I got my gift ready for Lindsay -- unfortunately, Walgreens Photo was running behind, but I was still able to drop it off on her front porch tonight.  I'm excited about this one.❤

(A high school friend of mine who lost a child posted a family portrait similar to this with a link to @harmonydesignshop on Instagram who does a lot of these... I messaged her but she hasn't gotten back to me, and her site said that custom orders are closed for the month - understandable, I'm sure she gets a lot of them.  Then I thought to myself, well, I can draw as long as I don't have to do detailed faces, and if I'm not selling it or profiting from it, then using this idea will be okay.  So after a couple practice rounds and adjustments, I made this one for Lindsay... baby Aspyn Jane happy and safe with Jesus, who is holding Lindsay's hand, then Phoenix Wade, Memphis Cruz, and Waverly Jean with their parents, all in their Aspyn Arrows shirts!  I was able to perfect a couple spots using Paint on the computer, then I sent it to Walgreens for an 11x14 canvas, which turned out great!  I threw in the cute bear just for fun. #yayValentinesDay)

This afternoon, my neighbors, Becky and Larry, dropped off a very thoughtful Valentine's gift... some chocolates and encouraging verses, along with a card letting me know they have a generator in case of a power outage and that they're happy to help out if there's ever anything I need!  That also made me very happy - yay for kindness and feeling supported!

 

 (And yay for chocolate!)

Not long after that, Chet Lee sent a similar text to a few people in our friend group, which of course also made happy and thankful for such good friends! =)

Continuing the happy streak, Cody Rigsby is BACK!!  He had COVID and it hit him hard - he has been out for a few weeks, and the #BooCrew and I have been worried.  But I'll get to spend my birthday eve on a live ride with him, and that is delightful news!

Yesterday was not my favorite - honestly, there was waaay too much screen time and too little human interaction from Tuesday to Friday, and I could feel my mood sinking.  Even Peloton and The Sound of Music wasn't quite pulling me out of it.  (I guess it didn't especially help that I'm listening to a book on death and grief, but it's been really good and thought-provoking. lol)  Anyway, after some sunshine and lots of kindness from others and being kind to others, plus good food and a good talk with Mom and Sarah, I feel so much better today! "My heart wants to sing every song it hears..." ;-)

I also got a fun Galentine's Day text from Elizabeth and this pic from David of the best girlfranz wanting him to share some chicken with them. lol  I'm glad the flompy sues are staying safe and warm in this cold weather!

In summary, super thankful for the sunny day allowing me to get outside a bit.  Bring on the snow now!  I'm also very thankful for God's kindness and the way He cares for us individually and picks us up when we are down.  If you need the reminder today, here you go...

Happy "Galentine's Day," friends!  Hope you feel loved and have a wonderful weekend!!

Thankful Thursday #120!

Today, I am thankful for:

1.  My fun-loving, creative, entertaining sister who is celebrating her 35th birthday today!!  I'm thankful for the many ways God is working in her life as she's moving into a new chapter, and praying for wonderful things ahead! ❤

2.  In case the above pics didn't convince you of our fashion expertise, here's one more. Seriously, though, I am thankful for having a Mom who cared enough to get us matchy Christmas dresses and have our photos taken and fix our hair and curl our bangs the way we wanted them in this awkward '90s bangs trend - I remember thinking I looked regal in that first picture. lol =)

3.  Having the world's cutest niece, who is celebrating her 100th day of school today!  The glittery shoes really set off the outfit, don't you think!? lol

4.  Today also marks the BIRTH-day of Lindsay's baby girl, Waverly Jean.  So excited for them and thankful for God's grace in giving them another girl!

5.  Grandad's cookies... I'm thankful we made this family cookbook a couple years ago and happy we included that recipe.  I made some yesterday, and the dough and the cookies were a lovely snow/ice day treat that brought back lots of good memories with him!

6.  Grocery delivery!!!  I feel a bit like a terrible person for using it today, but also, it's too slick for me to walk down and bring my trash can up, and I sincerely need some groceries pre-being snowed in for a week, and I'm tipping them really well.  After seeing a FB post about it being a "solid sheet of ice out there," I'm super thankful not to have to get out and drive and try to get back up my slanted driveway in this!  Hopefully it'll be a macho guy who thinks it's no big deal to drive in this.  (I'm also thankful for unexpected days off work.)  I ❤ penguins, so this post made me laugh... I don't actually get how this would protect you from falling, but my goal is never to have to try this. lol

7.  My lovely new Valentine's Day themed towels, thanks to Triston and Carter (they got them for Mamaw, but she doesn't have towels out in her kitchen, so she let me have them for this season)!  Makes me happy that they include pink and red hearts... and a bike! lol  #yayPeloton #yayValentines

 

Bonus:  I'm thankful for this hilarious video of an attorney who can't figure out how to turn off the cat filter for a court hearing!  His eyes darting around is the best - poor guy. lol  I need something like this to happen in one of our Bluejeans dockets. lol

 

Happy Thursday, friends!  Stay cozy and warm inside if possible, and if not, be careful and stay safe out there!!! ❤