Jesus, Jesus, Precious Jesus

More often than not, the background noise of music is playing in my mind or maybe being softly hummed out loud.  Sometime last week, the song in my heart was: "Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus... how I've proved Him o'er and o'er."  I had the lyrics slightly out of order and I couldn't think of the hymn's title, but it was bringing me comfort.  So I Googled it and promptly downloaded this Casting Crowns version of 'Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus. ❤

 

I've listened to it on repeat since, and it's been good for my soul.  I'm in a necessary-but-exhausting season of grief and growth, and I have zero desire to invest my heart, energy, time, and strength in something else that may fall apart and further hurt me.  But rather than numbing out, I need to focus on the foundation, on the solid Rock that is Jesus Himself.  Part of why I decided to read through the gospels each month this year was a strong desire to press into Jesus, to remember and connect with who He really is and what He really stands for, very much apart from the way our modern church has portrayed Him.  That's been really good for me too.  There is hope and healing and freedom and life available in Jesus.  And He is in me, and I am in Him.

Another thing contributing to my current level of exhaustion and need for counseling and healing is the fact that I've been too quiet and passive for too long about several things that matter to me.  Due to my love of peace and harmony and my experience-based fear of abandonment, people-pleasing can be a problem for me.  But I want to do better.  It's no secret that this has been a volatile past decade politically, and the vitriol and tension have been especially hard on those of us with empathetic hearts.  As I mentioned last week, I believe the conservative American church has lost sight of what matters most, veering off course and away from the heart of Jesus.  And although he has far more liberal ideas about how to fix some of those problems than I do, John Pavlovitz, a former pastor, wrote the following reflecting on that topic.  I found it sobering, and much of his perspective resonated with me and makes me want to do a better job of speaking up for truth in love and of living a life that truly represents Jesus:

"The people who are gone [who left the church] — aren’t gone because your band wasn’t good enough or because the messages weren’t clever enough or because your production wasn’t tight enough... Church, people are leaving you because you are silent right now in ways that matter to them.  You aren’t saying what they need you to say and what you should be saying—and it makes them sick.  They spend their days with a front row seat to human right atrocities, to growing movements of cruelty, to unprecedented religious hypocrisy, and to political leaders who are antithetical to heart of Jesus.  They live with the relational collateral damage of seeing people they love abandon compassion and decency; people who are growing more and more callous to the already vulnerable.  They see in their daily lives and on the news and across their timelines and in their communities, exactly the kind of malevolence and toxicity they expect you to speak into with boldness and clarity as moral leaders—and instead they find you adjusting the stage lights and renovating the lobby and launching websites…

Church, people can get most of what you offer them somewhere else. They can find meaningful community and entertainment for their families and acts of service to participate in. They can get music and inspiration and affinity and relationships without you.  The singular thing you can offer them is a clear and unflinching voice that emulates the voice of Jesus."

* * * * * * *

“Growing-up in the Church, I was taught that the worst thing one could be was a non-believer… The heart of the faith (I was told), was to live in a way that reflected the character and love of Jesus so vividly, so beautifully, that others were compelled to follow after Him; that a Christian’s living testimony might be the catalyst for someone’s conversion. The Bible called it “making disciples” and it was the heart of our tradition. As the venerable hymn declared, we Jesus people were to be known by our love. 

What a difference a couple of decades make. 

The Christianity prevalent in so much of America right now isn’t just failing to draw others to Christ, it is actively repelling them from Him. They see your hypocrisy, your inconsistency, your incredibly selective mercy...  For eight years they watched you relentlessly demonize a black President, deny his personal faith convictions, argue his birthplace, and assail his character.  And through it all, white evangelicals, you never once suggested that God placed him where he was, you never publicly offered prayers for him and his family, ...your evangelists never publicly thanked God for his leadership, your pastors never took to the pulpit to offer solidarity with him, you never made any effort to affirm his humanity or show the love of Jesus to him in any quantifiable measure.  And yet you gave carte blanche to a white Republican man... so unapologetically vile, with such a vast resume of moral filth that the mind boggles.  And the change in you is unmistakable.  It has been an astonishing conversion to behold… With him, you’re now willing to offer full absolution.  With him, all is forgiven without repentance or admission.  With him you’re suddenly able to see some invisible, deeply buried heart.  With him, sin has become unimportant, compassion no longer a requirement.  With him, you only see Providence.

Your willingness to align yourself with cruelty is a costly marriage...  You’ve lost an audience with millions of wise, decent, good-hearted, faithful people with eyes to see this ugliness.  You’ve lost any moral high ground or spiritual authority with a generation.  You’ve lost the plot.

One day soon, these same religious folks will look around, lamenting the empty buildings and the irrelevance of the church and a world that has no use for it, and they'll wonder how this happened.  They'll blame a corrupt culture, or the liberal media, or a rejection of Biblical values, or the devil himself - but it will be none of those things.  The Church is confirming the outside world’s most dire suspicions about itself …because thoseentrusted to perpetuate the love of Jesus in the world lost the plot so horribly and gave the world no other option but to look elsewhere for goodness and purpose and truth.  

Soon these Evangelicals will ask why so much of America has rejected Jesus, and we will remind them of these days, and assure them that they have not rejected Jesus at all—they just found no evidence of Him in their Church or in them.”

(-John Pavlovitz)

Important note from me (Lindsey):  My friend, Brittany Bolt, used to say "witness check - where is our witness for Christ!?" when the small group was not representing Him well in public.  I always loved her courage in speaking up for that!  It's incredibly rare to hear that from other Christians, but it shouldn't be.  The church absolutely should CARE about the message we are sending out to the world, about whether we are drawing others to Christ or repelling them.  As I said way back in 2016, where we are placing our hope matters.  What unifies us matters, and character always matters deeply (for our leaders and for our lives).  We cannot afford to pretend it doesn't.

I'm not saying I've done this well either - I've put too much stock in lazy comfort and not enough energy into building God's kingdom.  I've veered off course and lost sight of the passion for Christ that characterized so much of my youth, but it's not unfixable.  I've been convicted about that lately, and I'm learning a lot about the difference in remorse and true repentance, which I'll write more about another day.  Anyway, I'm feeling more determined and hopeful about finding a healthy church and becoming an active participant in helping it stay healthy.  There are massive problems that can make me feel cynical and defeated, and indeed I cannot fix things in the church nationally or globally... but I CAN find a healthy community and make a difference right here, and I need to step into that.  We all have an important role in the body of Christ, and I feel like I lose sight of that and feel left out and forgotten sometimes.  But God hasn't forgotten me (or you).  Don't downplay your own value in the body of Christ, and don't allow others to minimize it either.  You matter - your presence in the world matters - and you being present in the church matters.  (That's me talking to myself and to you.) =)  

Mmkay, that's all I've got for today.  Happy Monday - and make it a great week ahead!!