Friday Night Dinners!!

Well, I'm pulling an Emily Gilmore, minus all the strings attached. ;-)

I've set a goal to host 25 "Friday Night Dinners" with my group of friends over the next 7 months!!  I'm really jumping in with both feet here, and I'm excited to see how it goes!  Nothing super fancy - I am sending an email on Monday with the menu and mini-topic for that week, then people can let me know by Wednesday if they can make it!  I'm probably going to have to buck up and experiment and try some new recipes. There will still be times when we order pizza or do an easy potluck, but I'll mostly try to cook dinner for whoever comes.  There are 15 people invited, and the group size will obviously vary from week to week depending who can make it.  Cooking and cleaning house every week will certainly be a bit of a new challenge, but the far bigger shift will be internal... 

I am being more intentional about being a better friend.  More positive, consistent, and vulnerable (the 3 elements of healthy friendship, according to Shasta Nelson, whose book I just ordered).  After two besties-gone-bad combined with a few other toxic relational situations, I have gradually become very reluctant in friendships and struggled with feeling inadequate, like I am clearly not up to the task of forming and keeping healthy friendships, like something is fundamentally flawed inside me and I should just spare people the burden of getting close. I've had good friends all along, thank God, but I've been internally bracing up for another failure and pushing myself to hold certain things back and be strong enough to handle life and make decisions without having to really depend on my friendships.  It's not that my friends haven't been there, but that I haven't fully been myself with them. I was upset and venting to Mom recently, then I heard myself say, "But I obviously can't bring it up 'cause Lord knows I can't afford to lose another friend!"  So yeah, it's been hard and lonely a lot of the time (as I ironically write this to an audience of no one because I've also made this blog private). I've become hesitant to share my own story or let my heart get too personally involved with anyone, so much so that Vulnerability was my lowest-rated score on the "Friendtimacy Quiz" on Shasta's website.  =(  That was a wakeup call.  Intimacy and connection are things I HIGHLY value, but I've nearly lost that in the midst of toughening up to protect myself from future pain. God gave me a sensitive heart to care for and love and treasure people, to dive deep in relationships, to be brave and vulnerable and loyal and kind, to be there for others and encourage them, to need and deeply value their support in my life!! ♡ That is all part of my beautiful, God-given heart and purpose that I have not guarded very well... but I am determined now that I will not let Satan steal or destroy it!

I listened to a podcast last week where Shasta Nelson, a psychologist who studies the importance of close friendships, talked about loneliness being a huge factor that negatively impacts our health. How having a supportive network of people to help buffer the many stresses of life essentially bolsters us and negates the effects of major life stress on our bodies. There was a lot more to it, but that concept really stuck with me. We are not made to do life alone, (as much as I have been tempted to try sometimes). Part of choosing life is choosing to engage in close relationships.  It's not that I have to find a husband and get married - that may or may not ever happen. But having solid friends that I invest in and share my heart with is massively important, to me and to God. People who know me well and love me in spite of my flaws. A group of people who support each other through the ups and downs of life. Relationships have always been important to me - I've just believed the enemy's lies that I must be no good at them and should give up trying, that people are not worth the effort because they will probably let you down in the end. But I am fighting that now and fighting for healthy, fun friendships with depth and shared faith!  

I fully understand how I got here, so I'm giving myself a lot of grace for that!!  

And now I'm going to pick up and start fresh from here. I want to deliberately create space in my heart and in my home for the joy of community -- for good food, close friends, and great conversation!! =)  I may not be an experienced chef or hostess, but I can open my home and make people feel welcome and comfortable.  I can listen and make them feel seen and heard and appreciated.  I'm going with Ashley Campbell and Shauna Niequist's "present over perfect" thing. I will do my best to be fully present and engaged in the conversation rather than worried about perfecting every minor detail with the house and food and table. I've read books and stories about the beauty of community meals, and I have always adored the idea of having people I love gathered around my very own table, but felt like I had to wait until I was married or a better cook or more prepared somehow. It's just not true. So I am starting this very Friday, committing to weekly dinners through the next 7 months, and I think it's gonna be fantastic!!

♡❤♡

Photo Friday

The Wilsons made their official FB pregnancy announcement with this pic!  Love it!! =)

Chet: "We're gonna do a pic with a real estate sign that says 'Coming Soon'" when we post it on Facebook!"
JEM: "Just be sure it doesn't look too much like a real estate sign or people will just scroll right on by!" LOLOL

This is so me today. lol

I'm excited to get the physical copy of this scrapbook! Mom and I (mostly Mom) have been working on it quite a bit this week, and it's looking pretty awesome!! =)

Words of Wisdom Wednesday

"You are not defined by your darkest hour.
You are greater than what has been stolen from you.
It is never too late to heal.
It is never too late to make a fresh start.
It is never too late to have your heart restored."
~Kimberly Poovey

"Your soul is healthiest when it comes back frequently and wholeheartedly to God. That is when you are most alive. That is when you are most human. That is when you are home."  ~Judah Smith

"Yes, we need rest, we need responsibility, and we need restraint. But more than anything, we need relationship."  ~Judah Smith, (on the four keys to a healthy soul)

Quotables!! =)

"Yeah, we're excited -- and terrified!" -Chet, on finding out Karli is pregnant lol

Jaceman has a big crush on Zoe, the friendly Chick-Fil-A worker who always chats with him when they go through the drive-through...

Jace:  "I bet Zoe's married, isn't she!?"

Mom: "No, I don't think she's married yet."

J: "Oh, good!! Then I'm gonna marry her!"

(....long pause....)

J (cutely excited and nervous): "I'm so afraid to tell her!" 

Kyndal: "I will tell her for you, Bub. Don't be scared!"

So much cuteness!! ♡

"Can I get your lemon?" ~Kyndal Faith, amusing herself by taking the lemon out of every water glass at our table at Kate's wedding reception

"Are her hands clean!?" ~Me to Rachael

"Hmm, this one is super-dirty, so I'll just use this one!" ~Kyndal, holding her hands up for me to see LOL

"Yeaaaaah, let's just use some Purell right quick!" ~Me

"You did so good!!" ~Me, complimenting Kyndal's jump into the pool

"Umm, but did I do super-good!?" ~Kyndal Faith

"...Yeah, for sure!  Super good!!" ~Me lol

"Is my hair getting long and pretty, just like Momma's??" ~The presh-faced Miss K asking me that in the pool when Rach was gone to the dentist, wanting to be like her momma ♡

Jace (a week later):  "Hey!  I told Zoe that I was gonna marry her!!"

Me:  "You did!?  What'd she say?"

J:  She said, umm, "Thank you very much for..."

Kyndal, chiming in from the kitchen:  "No, she didn't. She just laughed!"

(David got really cracked up on that one. lol)

"Hey, Dave, can I take off your hat?  ...Hey, Dave, are you ready to come sit over here and listen to me talk about dinosaurs!??" ~Jaceman, freaking hilarious without trying to be

"Are you still a Navy Seal?" ~Jace

"Yes, you're always a Navy Seal!" ~David

"Yeah, but are you still??" ~Jace, clearly not catching what David meant. lol

"...and this was when you had makeup on!" ~Jaceman, showing Dave his canvas and pointing at the camouflage face paint - lol

"Don't let me forget - Sarah asked me to get her a cinnamon roll."  -Me

"Well, I asked her to come today!"  -Chettles with the sarcasm lol

"Maybe Dean can go on Bachelor in Paradise and find true love." -Jeffrey

"The only thing people find on the Bachelor in Paradise is STDs!" -LB speaking the truth!

"My goal today is to see a minority!"  ~JEM, after talking about the lack of diversity in line at The Mercantile

"I feel as southern as a butterbean!!" -JEM, midway through out tasty Mercantile breakfast

"Write that crap down!" -Chet, motioning to me (meaning for a quotables post) lol

"You're just trying to get into quotes with that!!" -LB 

"Well, I told Gary the next day, but he's the only one I told." ~Chet

"Hmm, we must not have worked out that day!"  ~Jeff lol

"Man, pregnancy is a bummer!" -LB as they listed off all the things Karli can't eat now.

"I have a decree: Mockey's blog will be public again by the time their baby is born!" ~JEM lol I agreed to this, which means I need to get on it with WW and healthy eating now!!

After discussing the possible grandparent names of "Lolly" (Karli's Mom) "Pop" (Karli's Dad), and "Girdy" (Chet's Mom)...

"We want my dad's name to be Spanky!" ~Jeffrey Edward lol

"Ugh, they need to have a Slap-a-Dumb-Realtor Day! ...just line em up!!" ~Chet, frustrated after a business call lol

"Chet text you that pic since you had text him a pic after you got married!" ~Me

"I knew that was why he did that!!" ~Sarah, laughing

"Yeah, well, it's always good when you can use your baby for revenge purposes." ~Me ;-)

"That's a blog quote!!" ~Sarah

Thankful Monday =)

"Enter His gates with thanksgiving, and His courts with praise!

Give thanks to Him; bless His name!"

~Psalm 100:4

This post is a mini life update and a few recent pictures!  So much to be thankful for lately!! ❤

I took Sarah out for a celebratory birthday dinner at Olive Garden last Tuesday. No pics of that, but it was fun - we had a great talk and got caught up on each other's lives!

Judge Golden had a Judicial Conference Thursday and Friday, which worked out so perfectly for me. lol  David, Mom's Navy Seal cousin, was staying with my parents from Wednesday to Sunday. Mom and I had spent part of the last weekend making a canvas and photo book gift for him with pics from his time serving in Vietnam as a Navy Seal, so I was hoping I could be there when he got those gifts.  I drove down and back on Thursday, and I got to swim with everyone at JoBug's, which was GREAT!  I actually wore enough sunscreen this time to avoid another painful burn. She had these new watermelon and lemon rafts -- they're filled with beads rather than being inflated, so the kids can stand on them and they still hold them up really well!  I had to get a pic with them on those!! =)

1. I can hardly handle how cute she is in her tiny little goggles! ♡

2. David eventually got in the pool with us, which made them so happy!

3. The kids loved getting his attention and telling him whatever random stories popped into their heads! =)

4. He and I tried teaching them to float. We were mildly successful. lol

5. The Jaceman doing a flip off the hot tub fountain!

6. This was the best. Miss K was pretending to be a dolphin and said she was gonna do a "dolphin dive." Apparently, that means a full-body flop!!  So funny!  She did it several times, so it must not have been as painful as it looked. lol

7. JoBug brought Gigi's cupcakes for the Miss and Jaceman. =)

8. Bullet always sits like this, and I think it's hilarious!  Such a refined lady. lol

9. Mom helping Jace down after he'd eaten all the icing he wanted.

We came home and showered and lazed around a little, then we all met up for dinner at Longhorn Steakhouse. We brought the canvas gift to give him, and he really loved it! I was happy to get to see that!  (The photo book came a day late, so I didn't get to see it, but Mom said it was nice and he loved it, too.)

Friday morning, I made my regular drive to Sapulpa, but not for work... I was meeting Laura and the Wilsons at Miss Scarlett's Tea Room... a late birthday lunch for Chet Lee!  (Here's a pic of us by my office painting when Chet came up to see the courthouse after lunch.) =)

Everyone but Laura had the sweet chicken salad sandwich with broccoli cheddar soup!  Me and Laura both tried the banana pudding dessert -- yummers! Chet came back to see the courthouse, and he commented several times that it was much nicer than he expected!  I think all our Creek County jokes had left him with pretty low expectations, but the building itself is pretty nice. lol  We got a pic of me and Laura in our regular work places, and a pic of Judge Wilson presiding over the courtroom with his trusty gavel. lol

Saturday morning, of course, was the Mercantile, which you can read about in my earlier post!  I didn't write this on the other post, but I got one biscuit and gravy (huge and filling) and a chocolate almond croissant for breakfast. It was such a fun and memorable morning with the friend group!! (Quotables coming soon.)

1. Sarah Elizabeth and I at her apartment pool Saturday night! Swimming + 50 cent Frostys at Wendy's = fun times!!
2. J&K holding David's canvas, which Jace "presented" to him. :)
3. J&K in their London t-shirts from Bill and Jill (who had a fantastic trip there)!!
4. My car being towed - sad day - but it was a fairly quick fix, and it's always nice to hang out at the Lexus dealership for a while!
5. Jon and Kristin serving as greeters when I came to check out Woodlake Church yesterday! lol  I loved the sermon about the Kingdom of God, and then I got to have lunch with the Fosters and Audrey at Qdoba, which was a treat all around!
6. My bday card for Chet Lee. I forgot about his no sweets rule yet again! lol
7. Last Monday was my first time to come to Jon and Kristin's group for game night at the Bixby Starbucks! I played Sushi Go with Audrey and Christian and a few other girls (meeting all of them for the first time that night)!
8. This was last Sunday, but Rach also painted the Trolls sign and Branch and Poppy peeking above it for the main entrance banner at MWC LifeChurch!! Very impressive!
9. One of the realtors Dad works with at SF asked if I could calligraphy this for her... one of the cheesier projects I've done, but it was quick and simple! lol

I'm all caught up and organized at work, which is another thing on the list of all I'm grateful for today!  So today, it's blogging and reading How's Your Soul? by Judah Smith!

The Mercantile Reveal!

Yesterday (Saturday, 7-22-2017), the Wilsons picked me up bright and early around 6:15 a.m. (my car battery died the day before - sad day).  We met the group at Jeff's, then headed to the Pioneer Woman's restaurant in Pawhuska, Oklahoma (me and Kyle with the Wilsons, JEM driving Laura and the Myers). Her restaurant is called The Mercantile. *They pronounce it Mercan-"teal," not Mercan-"tile," apparently, so my post title rhymes. =) lol

Here's a pic of our happy friend group with Ladd, a/k/a the Marlboro Man, husband of Ree Drummond, a/k/a the Pioneer Woman! After an hour and 23 minutes waiting in line, we were seated at this cute round table in a corner that gave us a little more privacy! =)

1. Laura was definitely more excited about meeting Ladd than the rest of us! lol 

2. Four kinds of delicious syrup for those with pancake breakfasts!

3. I took this one through the window outside. =)

4. When we first got in line!

5. Karli Marie eating her Goldfish snacks while we waited. lol That made more sense later...

6. My chocolate milk and water in a Mason jar. =)

7. The breakfast menu... best meal of the day!

8. Me excited to be by the fan for a minute during out outdoor wait!

The cute #Pawhuska sign outside, then several shots of the Mercantile store, which I spent a bit of the wait time exploring. lol  All very cute and colorful and fun!!

So the plan was to celebrate Chet Lee's 29th birthday there... little did we know there was another upcoming birthday we'd be celebrating!!!  They brought a gift that was supposedly a gift Karli was giving Chet because it didn't come in until the day before. He pulled out this "Rad Dad" t-shirt where we could all read it, but he clearly wasn't looking at the front of it... pretty sure all of us reacted with big eyes and dropped jaws, but we thought Karli was using this shirt to tell him the surprise, so no one spoke for a minute because we were waiting for him to look down and read it! LOL

...It turns out they had both known for a few weeks, so as soon as we were all clear on that, the "Congratulations" and happy hugs and questions and stories started pouring out!!  We saw pics of the photo shoot where their parents found out - so cute and funny! Chet had also ordered the second shirt, which said, "Be nice to me, my wife is pregnant!" lol

And the best news of all (not really, but it excited me) is that the due date is February 16th. So the baby arriving one day late would be nice so we can share a birthday. lol  They're not planning to find out the gender, but they have a few possible names picked out either way. Anyway, it was very big news and a really great day of celebration and thankfulness and fun with friends!! 💛💛💛

Savoring the Sweetness

Sometimes life is hard and painful, but sometimes it is light and sweet. I'm very thankful to be in a sweet season at the moment, and trying not to let any shadows of dread or overly deep analytical thinking keep me from fully enjoying it!!

Here's me and the mini Miss K at Kate's wedding reception this afternoon. =)

The niece and nephews at Maggiano's... Grandma Tina and Phil joined us and we all had a family style lunch there before the wedding. Sooooo tasty!  A smorgasbord of Italian awesomeness including bruschetta, Caesar salad, mozzarella marinara, cheese ravioli, fettuccine alfredo, spaghetti, chicken parmesan, butter cake, and double chocolate brownie with ice cream and strawberries!!! I congratulated myself on my super healthy choices when I threw in a couple bites of salad and a strawberry covered in ice cream! lol It was a tasty and fun lunch - lots of chatting with T-man about his life plan for the future, which was surprisingly specific and elaborate. =) He's awesome, and I'm certain he can do whatever he sets his mind to!

The fam... I sat on the edge next to Mom and got a couple good videos of Kate coming in and walking out!

Entering the reception area... they had floating candle centerpieces that were simple and very pretty. Add that to the lonnnnng list of wedding ideas I have floating around and likely will never get to use. lol

Rach and Kate... my 2007 Dreamgirls cruise buddies! lol

Bridesmaid Holly Dei coming to see Rach before the Parrishes left to head to their hotel!

A selfie of the three of us... all that's missing is Megan Elizabeth! :)

The kids were in terrible moods, prompting Rach and co. to leave before the dinner, dancing, and cake... but then the kids were super dismayed that they wouldn't get to see Kate... Kate and Phil came outside to get a couple pics by their getaway car (an old school Cadillac convertible) and that worked out well because the kids were all able to hug her and tell her goodbye!

That's all I've got for now!

Photo Friday

In the very serious news department... last night, I visited Marlene and Austin in the Alexander Burn Center at Hillcrest Hospital. Austin (her 15 year old son) was dousing a fire with gasoline and the fumes tracked back and ignited the gas can. He has 2nd and 3rd degree burns all over his body and has lost 30% of his skin. Since July 7th, he has received 6 blood transfusions, two skin graft surgeries, daily debridement treatments, etc.  

Between reading her updates and talking to her about it, I've learned so much about burns and burn care. The doctors were originally worried that they might have to amputate his feet because of circulation issues with the burn going around the full circumference of the leg, but they are past that now and he should be able to recover well. His skin will not sweat very well where there were burns, so he'll have to be more careful to not overheat. With all the burns and oozing skin and awful debridement procedures, his "donor sites" are the most painful thing (where they took the skin for the skin grafts). I remember that being extremely painful for Mom, and they had to take a lot more skin in his case. It's all just awful.  The healing process is brutal and excruciating. But thankfully, he will heal. Things will get better and they will get past this. It's hard for me just to read and hear about it - I can't imaging living it or having to watch someone I love go through that. Praying daily for him and Marlene and their close family and friends! 

It was nice to get to talk to her for a while and hear more about how it happened and how they're all doing, and I was glad to see that she was in good spirits as they'd had some encouraging improvements that day. It's gonna be a long, hard road, but the hope of light at the end of the tunnel makes it durable! God has put the right people (doctors, nurses, physical therapists, family, and friends) where and when Austin needs them there. He was craving Rib Crib, so I brought that for dinner. He had a couple friends there and they were playing video games. It made me happy to see that. I was nervous going into the burn unit, not at all sure what to expect and trying to brace myself not to react if I heard or saw anything awful. His face is clearly burned, but should fully recover without needing any plastic surgery or grafting. A lot of pain, but a lot to be grateful for!

In much lighter Photo Friday style news, hooray for these Wood Finish markers... taking Rach's scratched up baseboards and doorways from the first pic to the second!  ...While the Parrish fam was in Arizona, Mom and I (80% Mom, 20% me) went in and cleaned, organized, folded laundry, painted scratched walls and wood, etc. I was fairly irritated to be there during my week off at the time, but I'm glad I was able to help Mom and have some time to hang out with her! Hopefully Rach and Josh appreciated it. T-man was pretty excited about stuff Mom had organized in their room and bathroom, and that made me happy! =)

My main two projects were covering the wood scratches and making the bookshelves cute. Here's a before and after of this computer room shelf. =)

Dad even joined in the "fun," coming to change all the light bulbs that were out, sweep and clean the patio, and take out their trash a few times. Dad and I kept telling Mom we had done enough, but anyone who knows her well knows she is not one to be stopped when she's in "project mode!" So we pressed on... till the Parrishes finally got home on Saturday. lol

The Miss K with her babydolls. Freaking adorable.

This FB post by Courtney made me laugh. I totally see it, but Mom and Rach don't at all. ...The "I ❤ My Twin" caption is gold, either way! lol

Mmkay, that's all I've got for now. Tomorrow, we're heading to Dallas for Kate's wedding... should be fun!  On Monday, I am absolutely getting BACK ON TRACK with WW and working out!! But first, Maggiano's and wedding cake! lol

Thankful Thursday! (78)

"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him." ~Colossians 3:17

Today, I am thankful for:

1. Having the cutest niece and nephew and girlfranz ever!! ;-)

2. Rach discovering and using her creative talents!  This = a huge Trolls banner for the MWC LifeChurch's At The Movies!!

3. Patriotic cheesy pics! lol (Even though my shirt is repping Canada!)

4. My new living room - love it!  Sam n' Ella also approve!! lol

5. Fun times with friends at the farmhouse! =)

6. Restaurants that call this a "veggie plate!" lol  #pillarofhealth Me and Tiffany finally tried the Bread n' Butter restaurant and both got the three sides as a meal... yum!

7.  This presh wood panel pic of Miss Kyndal Faith (and that it finally arrived after some shipping issues)!

8. Not Your Grandma's Cupcakes... finally tried them, thanks to a Groupon deal! #noragrets (..."Really? Not even a single letter?" lolol)

9.  Randomly wearing this cute new hand-me-down-from-Rach shirt, then Chick-Fil-A counting it as cow attire for a free sandwich on Cow Appreciation Day! lol

10. Finding this pic of Alan, Gus, Josh, and Dad (at Rick's golf tournament in memory of Daniel) whilst cleaning Rach's bookshelves!

~ Ode to the Signature Wall ~

(This post is dedicated to Jeffrey Edward. lol)

Before I forget about it, here are some pictures to commemorate my signature wall (that's now been painted out with gray)!  ...In March of 2009, Mom and I painted the blues and the yellow stripe, and I painted cute little daisies all over it. ("Don't you think daisies are the friendliest flower?" -Kathleen Kelly, You've Got Mail)  Through the next 8 years, I had everyone who came to visit "sign the wall" in the yellow strip! 

Josh Lewis was the only person to go outside the yellow, with his doodle of the rock climbing guy trying to get onto the wall! lol (Top left below) Laura and Melody's signatures make me happy. And I'm glad Jairus signed the wall. Dad adding "Go Pokes" makes me laugh! Precious Grandad signing with G.D. also cracks me up! Aww, memories of when Cassie and I tried P90X at the same time!  And I love Hayley being excited about my Wonder Years' pic of Kevin and Winnie! =)

Oscar wanted me to sign again after running the full, but instead of miles, he wrote 26.2K, so I signed it after one of my Halfs! lol  Ruth's signature makes me happy. Karli signed when she was still a Weatherford, and Chet added that it was at his bday party! lol  K-Lamb wrote an ode to me, then Jon later crossed out Lamb and changed it to Foster. lol  JEM signed the first time he came over for dessert after our Valentine's Eve "Lonely Heart's Club" dinner at Johnny Carino's! LOL 

Tall Kyle, Charlene, Bobbi, Michael Liebe, Jenna (who I think was the last person to sign the wall - myself being the first), Angie, etc. My Aunt Nancy Claire signed it "To Claire... Love Aunt Claire" =)

My signature, Carl's lovely drawing, Mom's signature (same day as mine - 2nd one on the wall), Nater-tot celebrating our LG ice cream party, Tiffany, etc.  The random "You are a ★" from Lindsay Morris makes me laugh!

Josh Parrish when they came to the Jenks Aquarium (before they were engaged). Michael Wilson and Sarah Heiskell back in the day, Natalie Reid, Kim Dean, my 2009 roommate (whose opinion of me has drastically changed), Dentist Neil, JoBug, Jay, Brittany Bolt drawing the Jamaican flag, Chettles quoting LifeChurch and drawing the workout girl in heels!  =)

The bulletin board, TV, mirror, and TV pics all stayed. After checking with several different friends and family who didn't seem interested, the bike and treadmill were finally donated to the Salvation Army.

JEM:  "So did you just decide, like, 'I'm done!'?"
Me:  "Yeah, I'm done with all these people!!  ...No, I just wanted a fun change, but trust me, I documented it all!"
... after telling Chet about it....
JEM:  "I know this probably won't affect you as much because you're like..."
Chettles:  "Out with the old!!" lol

Anyway, yay for my 8 years with the bright signature wall, and yay for the new look of that room now!!  The boundary lines of that yellow border are still so clearly there when you get close to the wall, so I may do some other kind of border around that room someday. =)