Be Near Me... Stay Close

The song on my heart over the last few days has been the second verse of Away in a Manger: 
"Be near me, Lord Jesus.
I ask Thee to stay
close by me forever, and love me, I pray.
Bless all the dear children in Thy tender care.
And take us to heaven to live with Thee there."

Random, yes, but perfectly fitting and comforting to me when it came to mind... because He IS always near, and He always loves us, and He will bring us to heaven.

I am determined to finish this year well, and I'm working toward that goal in a few different ways.  For me, food can be a comfort thing and an emotional numbing agent.  So whenever I focus on healthier eating and not allowing myself to indulge in everything I want, it has an extra layer of difficulty in that I'm suddenly *really feeling* a few things I've held at arms length for a while.  That dynamic (of being forced to deal with my emotions and confront the places that feel scarily empty inside me) means it's also an extra layer of becoming healthier as a person, so I'm trying to embrace that and press in with God on both fronts... but I won't pretend it's not challenging.

Okay, so the gaslighting and the childhood part of the meme below doesn't apply to me, but the tendency to over-explain and over-share in response to soul trauma rings VERY true.  I can talk about it and write about it for days and still feel mostly misunderstood and disconnected, right when I'm craving connection more than ever.  Anyway, this one really hit me when I read it, and I'm praying about how to best respond.  For right now, I'm trying to keep at the forefront of my mind that God always hears me and knows my heart and values me.  Meditating on that truth, having compassion for myself, and grounding myself in reality any time I feel hints of panic.

I went for a delightful walk at Crescent Park yesterday morning.  It was refreshing and fun and good for me, and a nice day to spend time outside.  Hopefully next time I go, the trees will be sporting their fall colors! =) 

This random pandemic meme was posted in an Introvert-themed FB group, and it really made me laugh!  ...It's not wrong.

And one last thing I saved lately... a good reminder for me to consider the situation and have grace and be compassionate with myself and my family and others. ❤

Lots of intense content here, but look how I used a fun font. lol  ...I promise my next post will be lighter in tone, but thanks for being here either way!

Hope you've had a lovely weekend.  ~LCM