Chosen Family + Memes

Happy Monday, friends and fam!  I'm feeling better today and still thinking things through.  I have high expectations for myself, sometimes unrealistically so.  My ability to empathize and understand where other people are coming from is pretty strong - in almost any hard situation, I immediately and intentionally think about the backstory behind someone's hurtful behavior (toward me or others I love), and my unspoken/unrealistic goal is that this empathic understanding would serve as a self-protective barrier empowering me to transcend it all - to rise above feeling defensive or deeply hurt by anything... like I'm seeing it all from an out-of-body perspective, able to think rationally about the cause and feel nothing personally.  Sometimes trying to transcend your own needs and feelings only makes the emotional aftermath more intense.  The Holistic Psychologist posted yesterday saying, "Trauma explains behavior. It does not excuse it."  That was something I needed to hear.  It's not okay for me to feel unsafe and on edge - and I need to speak up for myself the way I would for someone else… it’s okay to hold people accountable and set boundaries, even if there is legitimate pain behind their bad behavior, which is almost always true.  Healthy people feel their feelings, so numbing out should never be my goal.  It is normal for hurtful things to feel hurtful.  Feeling hurt is not childish or stupid or immature, even though the phrase "this hurts my feelings" makes me feel about 5 years old.  I need to set clear boundaries and speak up for myself and others while maintaining my God-given empathy and love for the other person… aka speaking the truth from a place of love, having courage and being kind!  Mastering that and discerning when it's important enough to confront someone will be a lifelong project for me, but it's good to have goals. lol

Anyway, thanks for witnessing my inner dialogue there.  Today, I am grateful for my immediate family, my extended family, and my chosen family!  These seven families are high on the list of safe people for me, and I'm grateful for the sense of community and belonging I feel here. ❤

"One day at a time."  A regular mantra for me.

Yes to this! lol  Very happy to get a day off tomorrow!

(Or the co-pilot with Jesus!) ;-)

Lol I'm actually a big fan of raisins and cashews too!

YAY boundaries!
Love the concept.
Struggle hard with the real life application.

My choice again this Saturday. #noregrets

"Well, it may have escaped your notice, but life isn't fair!"  He really does look like Snape here.

Yaaaay, therapy!

Lol

This made me laugh!

Kudos to the early risers!!

Truth be told, this was one of my favorite candies as a child!

A Disney-themed Mother's Day post!  RIP Bambi's mom.

I saw Book Club: The Next Chapter yesterday.  Basically an older version of Sex and the City that celebrates female friendships and shallow humor.  For whatever reason, I enjoy that group of actresses -- Mary Steenburgen (the Charlotte), Diane Keaton (the Carrie), Candice Bergen (the Miranda), and Jane Fonda (the Samantha).  In this movie, their book was The Alchemist.  They put the first part of this quote on screen, which I read and cringed and said, "nope" out loud... then they slowly faded in the second line, and I snapped a photo. 

 That was the theme of the movie - the power of choosing your own course.  Overall, it was cheesy and could've been better.  But I really liked that they used the phrase, "Okay, best friends -- tough love..." before calling each other out on the mindsets that were holding them back.  Yay for the theme of speaking truth in love and cultivating healthy relationships!

Fun Fact:  This day last year was my moving day (HERE).

Anyway, thanks for being here, and
hope you have a delightful week ahead!! ❤