New/Favorite Quotables

“If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.” ~Jane Austen

“Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different.”-Oprah

"Kids, one thing you'll learn about relationships is that you're never done getting to know someone..."  ~Ted, HIMYM

“My thought is, if you don't have underwear on within five minutes of getting out of the shower, you need therapy!” ~Chet, of the men at gym showers - lol

“You know, I intend to own a herd of buffalo one day… it’s really a bucket list item. I just like the idea of the buffalo herd grazing and roaming around.” ~Jeff, serious, upon seeing the Bison sign at the Farmer's Market :)

“Nahs to meet you!” ~Jeff, to my Mom

“Wow, that was a definite Texas accent!!” ~(all of us)

“Well... my head was turned!” ~Jeff :)

“I just think we're gonna meet again someday. Like I just feel like God’s gonna work that out and we're gonna be friends! You know, he's a cool guy. I could be like a mentor. (long pause) Me and Usher.” ~JEM :)

"I want adventure in the great wide somewhere!
I want it more than I can tell...
And for once, it might be grand
To have someone understand,
I want so much more than they've got planned."
~Belle, Beauty and the Beast

"Attention, all Creepers, Go to the Wal-Mart Neighborhood Market right now. You all are having a convention of sorts at this time." ~Amanda Wille :)

“Think only of the past as its remembrance gives you pleasure.” ~Darcy, Pride and Prejudice

"Authenticity without integrity is lethal." ~Erwin McManus

“It looks like something you’d see in the Brady Bunch house." ~Me, on the couch fabric

“Exactly!” ~Malori, ready to buy it :)

"At times, life is wicked and I just can't see the light. A silver lining sometimes isn't enough to make some wrongs seem right." ~Creed

“And during that whole peaceful God sunset thing, I just decided..... I really need to go shoot my gun!” –K-Lamb, totally serious

"She looks like a walking disaster, then she opens her mouth and it's confirmed." –Rach

"Slow down, you're doin' fine. You can't be everything you wanna be before your time, although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight... You know that when the truth is told, you can get what you want, or you can just get old."

~Vienna Waits for You

“Well, I read somewhere that you live longer if you get a dog…”

“Good Lord, how long do you wanna live!?” ~Babah

“Till I die!”  ~Grandad

“I actually thought I was on to something with butter slices!  You know, like cheese slices?  Pancake, butter, pancake, butter… melt!”  ~Chet Lee

“So… is he gonna be black?”  ~T-man confused by Jace’s ultrasound pic :)

“Do girls not work?” –Triston, confused when I didn’t give him a quarter for the gumball machine

“I do work. I just don’t have any quarters right now.” -Me

“Because boys make quarters when they work.” –Triston (who had just gotten several from Dad and Josh)

“Well… mine are all at the bank.” –Me :)

“We interrupt your regularly scheduled, floral-bouquet-dominated newsfeed with something completely different. My dear friend Lindsey brought me the most wonderfully horrible assortment of things she knows I hate. Haven't ever laughed so hard on VDay or simultaneously been so repulsed… Only someone that knows me well could pull this off without making me dry heave.”  ~Laura

“OUCH!  Someone come hold my hand!!  …No, not YOU, Carter!” –Triston… I love the drama of children’s emotions :)

“She’s like me… only worse... in a good way!”  ~Chet describing Malori’s blunt-ness

“Yeah, Jeff calls and asks if I wanna just sit in the car and talk instead of jogging this morning… but now that we’re here, suddenly, he’s Mr. Triathlon!”  ~Chet, annoyed with Jeff mocking him for shortening the run distance that morning - lol

“Complacency is never very comfortable with audacity… don’t let anyone but God himself put you in your place!”  ~Steven Furtick

"Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike." ~J. K. Rowling

“All you are is mean. And a liar. And pathetic. And alone in life, and mean!” –Taylor Swift

"Why don't you just close your door?" -Martin

"And just concede defeat!? Better yet, why don't I just move out, let him have the run of the place? Yes, I'll get two apartments -- one for me, one for my cricket!!" -Frasier :)

"Seriously, who thinks the little packs are the 'fun size' anyway? Three M&Ms in a bag?! -- That's not fun!" ~Kristin, discussing Halloween candy :)

"Heeks us now, only in my memory. What movie?" -text from Rach :)

"Time you enjoy wasting... was not wasted!” ~John Lennon

"Someday, we'll have to have our pill sorters out just to remember which pills to take." ~Faye

"Nah, we won't have to worry about that because we'll be under Obama's special plan that kills off all the old people!" ~Ruth :)

"Is she wearing jeggings??" -Me

"Probably! And if so, she's probably like, 'Oh, jeggings, pour your love on me!'" -Rach

(random hilarious conversation during the LC worship service)

"Hey Swadie, why don't you get online right quick and figure out a way to make us a billion dollars. Or really, a hundred million would be good enough!!" ~Mom, after we saw The Social Network (I'm on it.)

“Real difficulties can be overcome; it is only the imaginary ones that are unconquerable.” ~Theodore N. Vail

Chet: "Which post was it?"

Malori: "The latest one... you know, where I was all happy and out of character!"

"We need you to help us see -- it's like that kid in the Sixth Sense who sees dead people."

"Wait a minute, you're equating quality women to dead people!??"
-Mike and Stephanie, My Boys

"You know what they say, son: What doesn't kill you makes you stronger!" -Martin
"Yes, Dad, but not everyone makes it into that second group." -Niles

"Like: Ith my birfday today!!" -Malori

(Talking about the adorable bunny in Robin Hood, and how they always give certain Disney characters a lisp to make you feel even worse for them... so hilarious!)

"We have defined holiness through what we separate ourselves from rather than what we give ourselves to. I am convinced that the great tragedy is not the sins that we commit, but the life we fail to live... For too many of us, because we fear failure, we are afraid to try. I think it’s one of the reasons we entertain ourselves to death. We find our romance in You’ve God Mail, and we fight our battles through William Wallace and Maximus Aurelius. And there might as well be a glass screen between real life and us because the closest we get to fulfilling our life’s dreams is watching them!"  ~Erwin McManus, Chasing Daylight

"Influence is always more powerful than authority. We would much rather be magnetically pulled in a direction than controlled by the force of power and consequence. Influence can be a great thing, especially when we distinguish it from manipulation." ~E.W.

"Many of us want a map, but what we get is a compass... when you move forward on what you know, things become clearer. When you refuse to act on what you know, all that you do not know paralyzes you."  ~E.W.

"Whenever God is doing a new thing, He does it through people. And those He chooses to lead the way are often considered fortunate only in retrospect. Whenever God moves forward, it is in conflict with many other forces. The kingdom of God can expand only out of conflict with the kingdom of darkness. Hate does not surrender easily to love, nor does evil submit quietly to good."  ~E.W.

"The opposite of love is not hate; it is indifference."

~Elie Wiesel

"We see God as a means to an end rather than the end itself. God as the assistant to our life versus God as our life."

~John Eldredge, Walking With God

"Sooooo..... you are Jesus Christ of Nazareth??"

~my judge, talking to a crazy defendant who called himself "the Lamb of God" :)

"Never forget that time by itself does nothing to heal." ~Beth Moore (on the importance of letting God in and forgiving)

"You rarely get to keep something you have to manipulate to get!!" ~Beth

"If we're convinced God is sovereign, good, and purposeful, why would He allow or even ordain a season that has no value or contribution to our futures?"  ~Beth

"We are far more upset when things go wrong than we ever are when we aren’t close to God… We see God as a means to an end rather than the end itself. God as the assistant to our life versus God as our life."  ~John Eldredge

"It'll be just like Bridget Jones, you know, minus all the relationships and the smoking."

~Malori, talking about writing her life story

"Is this some kind of a joke!? I was gone 3 hours!!" ~Ricky Bobby (upon coming home to find his wife remarried to his best friend, best part of the movie by far!)

"Let's go! Every horror movie ever made was probably based on a true story from this town." ~Kate after going to the bathroom at a disgusting gas station, so funny

"I love that movie! I saw it 3 times." -Rach, talking about Wild Hogs

"Aww, come sit on my lap." -Kate, off in her own bizarre but funny world

"That's .......weird!  Because I've seen Wild Hogs??" ~Rach

"Now, I have a machine gun. Ho...Ho...Ho." ~Hans, slow and angry (Die Hard)

"I kinda teared up there for a second! I was just glad I had on my 3D glasses..." ~Rach, describing Up :)

"Oh, yeah, everyone’s busy… busy, busy, busy.  What's been keeping you so busy lately!??" -George Kostanza
"Well.... mostly the chemotherapy." ~Jon Lovitz' character

Marilla: "Weren't you taught to say your prayers?"

Anne: "Well, Mrs. Hammond told me that God made my hair red on purpose, and I've never cared for Him since."  :)

"I am JUST LIKE Danny Ocean in Oceans 11!" ~Mark, totally serious, while playing poker at our house

"Milly and me's goin' to town!!" ~Seven Brides for Seven Brothers

"Are you yelling at me!?" -Bruce Willis as Elizabeth's dad, Paul

"God, NO." -Ross (my favorite of the friends, though no one else seems to feel that way.)

"He and I don't really talk that much ever since he chased me off with a weed eater." -Wesley Blake :)

"I like your blonde hair. But it's dark underneath... did you mean for it to be like that?" -Jenny

"Ummmm, yeah!" –Kate

"Sometimes, I don't wear bras with certain tops." -Kate

"Me too, but I don't look slutty or whorish." -Jenny

"Huh!? Did you just call me slutty and whorish in the same sentence?" –Kate

"Are you mentally handicapped?" -Aaron, (opposing Mark in Debate class, speaking on rights of the mentally handicapped)

"Maybe! I've never taken an IQ test." -Mark, never wanting to give a direct answer... so funny

"Ahem... always consult me before you do things like that." -Amber (Gene tried to fit the mirror into our trash can by breaking it into a million little pieces.) Mom was worried about Kelsey stepping on the glass...

"Oh, I don't think she'd step on it. Her paws are so tiny." -Gene

"That...... doesn't make any sense." -Amber :)

"Get inside the system, and make it work for you like little puppets!" -Mark, commenting on Rach and I always being office aides and the perks that came w/it! ;)

"WHAT!? Ohmygosh, I'm getting wet!!" ~Wes, when he went to pick up the football in our neighbor's yard and their sprinklers came on... hilarious!

"Respect your elders, Megan." -Holly

"You just said you'd rather be the moon than a llama. That pretty much cancels out the respect." -Megs :)

“I mean, what’s more important?  Love… or silliness!?”  ~Ross

“Jaaaack, the vending machine is broken!” ~Liz Lemon

“I know.  I broke it… I needed to speak with you and I knew that was the fastest way to get you in here.” ~Jack, 30 Rock :)

"Okaaaay, I feel awkward." -Jeff, turning around after we'd been behind the drunk skanky girl for a while in Vegas! lol

"Uh-ohhh, I'm starting to feel sick. I better spit this gum out." -Me, on our plane ride back home

"Well, maybe that's because it's Doublemint!" -Malori, not super compassionate just then

"Hey, did any of you ever do those Glamour Shot pictures!?"  ~JEM

Me: "Yep."

Jeff: "I did too." (We all turned around and perked up at that point)

Chet and Malori: "Whaaat?"

Jeff: "Yeah, you know, we all did 'em!"

(He was confused and talking about Senior pictures, but it was HILARIOUS, and earned him the nickname "Glamour Shots.")

Congrats on making it through this list!!