The Darkness and the Fog...

Please pray for my cousin, Kristin, her husband, Frankie, and their newborn baby, Anthony... he is in Intensive Care right now. He was born with a heart defect that is worse than the doctors initially thought, his liver is out of place, and he has "horseshoe kidneys." Things are obviously off to an overwhelming/rough start, and all prayers are appreciated!

While most parents would be celebrating and holding their precious new baby for the first time tonight, instead they are crying and praying for God's help and mercy, that nothing else will go wrong.  It's truly the worst feeling ever when sadness and fear find their way into the center of something that should be full of so much joy!  I am extra emotional on this thanks to the recent birth of my nephew, and being reminded how very helpless and precious babies are.  I got the text from Mom and immediately teared up while telling the lifegroup to pray for their family.

On my way home from lifegroup, I was praying through all of this... thinking about how hard and confusing it must be for them, how strange and scary it can feel when we don't know what lies ahead of us or why certain things are happening.  I was not angry with or even questioning God this time, just pondering... 

And my thoughts were interrupted by the fog.  It was foggy outside tonight... I mean, a rare, dense, ridiculously thick fog.  I had to slow down because I could only see as far as my car's headlights were shining.  I could see the boundary lines of the lane I was in on both sides, and when I got close enough to it, I could see the street signs to know where to turn.  But that was it... everything else was dark and cloudy.

The Holy Spirit connected those dots pretty quickly...

There are times in all of our lives when it's hard to see where we are going, what is ahead for us, why this is happening, etc.  Times when the confusion is so thick that we sincerely wonder if God has forgotten about us.

First off, the fact that we cannot always see the big picture clearly does not mean it isn't there or that God is not working!! 

"Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path." -Psalm 119:105

Lamps do not put off much light, but it's just enough to take the next step forward.  Spiritually speaking, we are living in a dark world, and sometimes, there are emotional clouds or "fog" that disrupt our lives in addition to that darkness.  When that happens, the first thing we need to do is turn on the light.  Open up God's Word.  Pray.  Even if you feel nothing, or even if you have to cry or scream through it.  The second thing to do is slow down... don't make any major life decisions when you're emotionally upset.  Don't dwell on the darkness or get in a panic over the fog and throw yourself off course, but put your focus on what little you are able to see clearly through God's Word.  At the very least, we can always see the boundary lines... the Holy Spirit's conviction inside us showing us what not to do, where not to go.  Even if the fog sticks around for a while, it teaches you to slow down and pay closer attention to the Light, searching for the signs and the path and where God wants you to turn.  And when you get close enough to that turning point in your life, God will make it clear to you.  And eventually, the fog will lift and the sunlight and clarity will return... because our God is a God of restoration, and nothing He does in our lives is without purpose.

All of that is not just a cheesy metaphor for me... I feel like I have lived that out more than once now.  I told the group tonight that the key phrases God had me dwelling on at the end of 2011 were "Let there be light" and "separate the light from the darkness."  To fully surrender and let Jesus in, asking Him to shine in my heart and make things clearer, and to make sure that I remember no matter what happens in my life that "there is no darkness in Him."  Part of my verse for 2012 (Micah 7:7,8) says "Though I sit in darkness, the Lord Himself will be my LIGHT." 

There are days when life feels perfect and sunny, and everything ahead of and around us is clear.  But trouble will come, and our faith and character will be tested.  There will be times of overwhelming sadness and pain, where we are tempted to doubt God's goodness.  When those days come, the sheer emotion always threatens to dramatically throw our lives off course into a pit.  Jesus Christ - knowing Him and seeking Him through God's Word - He is the only way that we will ever find victory and peace through the darkness and the fog. 

"Let there be light..."