Sanctification (February Focus)

"So then, dear friends, since we have these promises, let us cleanse ourselves from every impurity of the flesh and spirit, bringing holiness to completion in the fear of God."  ~2 Corinthians 7:1

Happy February, friends and family!!  I had the day off yesterday due to winter weather, and it was a glorious and well-timed day of rest for me - sleeping in, movies, light reading, bubble bath, etc.  I feel refreshed and encouraged, ready to step into a new month with new purpose!  Praying this month holds good things ahead for all of us! ❤

My word for 2023 is Sanctification, which means "growing in divine grace as a result of Christian commitment after conversion; to cleanse, consecrate, or set something apart for God's special use and purpose."  God plays the major role in making us more Christlike, but we also have a responsibility to obey Him and pursue holiness.

This month, my focus is intentionally asking God to show me where I've made agreements with Satan's lies, then prayerfully breaking those agreements!

John Eldredge was the first to introduce this concept to me several years back.  If we are dealing with any repetitive sin, long-term bitterness, or stronghold, it originated with an agreement that has allowed it to grow and take root in our lives.  And when we break that agreement and intentionally turn to God, we are able to reclaim our rightful place of authority and freedom through Christ, breaking destructive patterns and moving forward with more hope and peace!

(*For more explanation of what I mean by agreements, see John Eldredge's post HERE.)

My goal is to spend some time praying and journaling about this every weekend.  I will be asking God to reveal things throughout this month and really praying over anything He shows me.  Sometimes this feels vague and foggy, so I'm also praying for clarity of language to be able to express my thoughts and expose the lies, as well as Scriptural truths to use against them!!

Taking this seriously will help me renew my mind with truth and create a clean slate.  Like pruning a plant that just grows back stronger, our sins and wrong thought patterns will return and repeat themselves over and over until we deal with the root and uproot them out of our lives.  (Hint: The agreement is the root!!)  It's not easy work, but worth it in the end.  (It's also a lifelong process, as new weeds will spring up here and there - so we take every thought captive and try to catch the lies early, and when we've allowed something destructive to grow in our lives, we deal with that aggressively.)

My other big goal that also falls under personal sanctification for me = paying attention and tracking my food all month long, day by day, meal by meal.  Writing it all down.  Not  shaming myself or expecting perfection this month, but not allowing myself to tune out and eat mindlessly either.  I want my life to produce better fruit, so this will be my spiritual focus for this lovely month of February!! ❤

Happy Birth-month to Me! lol

JANUARY 2023!

QUOTE OF THE MONTH:

"Oh, I hate being taken out...
I think my coach doesn't really get how good I am."
~Kyndal Faith, making me laugh while watching a basketball game (none of them are truly very good at that age, but I like her confidence!)

Victories, Big and Small:

• Made my bed every day this month (my smallest 2023 new habit goal)! =)
• Daily Peloton workouts for at least 30 minutes total!!
• Daily morning worship + Scripture reading podcasts!!
• Attended church in person every Sunday except New Year's Day!!
• Wrote the paper I'm most proud of thus far (more on that later).

Partial Successes/Areas for Improvement:

• Enjoyed several outdoor walks around Norman at lunchtime and at the Station on weekends and days off!  I want to engrain this as more of a daily lunchtime habit.
• Lost 8 pounds through the month, mostly because I started it at my highest weight.  I bought groceries and cooked more often, did some WW tracking and made healthier food choices sporadically, but I plan to become more and more consistent with all of that!
• I set a goal of praying for difficult people/ praying through anger for 10 minutes a day.  I took time to pause and really focus on that about 1/3rd of the days, but I said a quick prayer on other days, and I know I've made progress here.  I'll try to plan better for next month's goal!

Memories:

• Praying with Mom and Dad just before Mom's surgery
• Petting Molly the Therapy Dog and chatting with Dad and Bill while Mom was in surgery
• Staying at the hospital with Mom that first night, then being so surprised and grateful for the rapid recovery and lack of intense pain - yay, robotic surgery!
• Celebrating Mom's 68th bday at The Ranch
• Tiffany coming to visit and hang out with fam
• Celebrating the Foster's adoption finalization hearing!
• Discovering Byrdie's Bakery and getting a free sample on a lunchtime walk
• Discovering The Station/Central Park, as well as a McAlister's and Johnnie's near my house!
• A fun dinner with the Wilsons and Fultons
• Hair appt with Janelle - going red and getting bangs
• Feeling very overwhelmed and dropping one of my CCU classes early this month
• Jace getting braces, then breaking his finger catching a basketball in the wrong spot
• Kyndal Faith making her first goal at a basketball game, and Jace scoring several times in various games

Listened to:

• The seven audiobooks mentioned HERE + starting two more that'll be on February's list
• 15 PODCASTS (some off and on, some daily, some weekly):
• ESV - Through the Bible in a Year
• Let's Read the Gospels with Annie F. Downs
• Call of the Day with Dave Ramsey
• Enjoying Everyday Life with Joyce Meyer
• Doing the Best We Can with Eddie Kaufholz
• That Sounds Fun with Annie F. Downs
• The Big Boo Cast with Melanie Shankle and Sophie Hudson
• The Holderness Family with Penn and Kim Holderness
• LifeChurch with Craig Groeschel
• Office Ladies with Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey
• Wild at Heart with John Eldredge & Friends
• Elevation with Steven Furtick
• Therapy and Theology with Lysa TerKeurst
• Annie and Eddie Keep Talking reruns
• The Pour Over Podcast - a brief overview of the latest national/world news 3x a week from a Christian perspective, with comforting verses thrown in after stressful headlines. lol

*For the rest of the year, I'll refer to this list as "the usual podcasts."

Lessons Learned:

• From the Fosters' example - God is faithful to bring about His good plan for us; our obedience in the waiting season matters and makes an impact!
• From personal experience - Night shift is understaffed and often apathetic - when someone you love is in the hospital, I highly recommend staying with them to help advocate for them and meet smaller needs!
• From personal experience - It's okay/good to take a step back when you're internally buzzing with too much stress!
• From Annie F. Downs - Try to view January and February as a ramp-up season for your big 2023 goals rather than putting all the pressure and expectation on yourself for an abrupt change on January 1st.  This perspective shift has been super helpful for me in having grace for myself and not feeling defeated as the year is just ramping up!!
• From John Eldredge - In any struggle, do your best to stay on guard spiritually - we have an enemy who loves to kick us when we are down, but we also have God-given authority over him!
• From the Holy Spirit - Choose courage and know that God's Word supersedes the world's ever-changing definition of ethics!

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

Small Changes; Remarkable Results =)

Making my bed has never been a habit/routine for me,
but I've decided to prioritize it this year,
and I'm 30 for 30 so far! ❤

"Every morning in basic SEAL training, my instructors, who at the time were all Vietnam veterans, would show up in my barracks room and the first thing they would inspect was your bed... every morning we were required to make our bed to perfection. It seemed a little ridiculous at the time, particularly in light of the fact that were aspiring to be real warriors, tough battle-hardened SEALs, but the wisdom of this simple act has been proven to me many times over.

If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride, and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another. By the end of the day, that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed. Making your bed will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter. If you can’t do the little things right, you will never do the big things right.

And if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made — that you made — and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better.

If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed."

~Admiral William McRaven, 5-17-2014
University of Texas Commencement Speech (Excerpt)

Photo Friday!

 Happy Friday, friends and fam!!  Huzzah that the weekend is almost here! ❤

Since I take approximately 100 photos per day and also save all the memes I like, I'm writing a new post three days in a row this week. lol  First off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Tiffany Joanne today!!  Wishing her joy and light through the year ahead!  Tiffany came into my life just as Malori was on her way out in 2013.  Our first hangout was the JT concert that year, and I'm super thankful for our almost ten years of friendship now! ❤ #tenfinity #wemustcelebrate

Blake and Wendy (my cousin and his wife) are building a Taber home - yay!!  Different neighborhood, but they're going to come look at mine this weekend and chat about ideas and tips.

Well, two of my good friends, aka two Peloton coaches from London that I've never actually met in real life, are going through a very rough season... Ben and Leanne got engaged last year, then Leanne was diagnosed with breast cancer just after losing her best friend in a tragic accident.  They are individually delightful and truly a lovely couple - the kind of people who exude so much joy you tend to assume they have it easy, but life hits us all sometimes.  Praying for healing and strength and better days ahead.  Ben is so supportive of her as she's going through chemo, and it makes me happy to see that. The endearing catchphrases I've learned from her all apply here... I'm hoping this season will be "done and dusted" soon.  "Yes to you!"  "Sending you love and light!"  "Wishing you sparkly days ahead!" ❤

Cuteness... may the force be with him!  I'm looking forward to this and two other fun kid bday parties next weekend!

Since I had the day off and was back in the afternoon, I took a sunny 45-minute walk (an epic Peloton class with 80s movie music) at The Station yesterday.  I'm still very thrilled about having this lake trail so close to me! ❤  Also, I ran out of hairspray and haven't remedied that yet, so my hair is looking affright with all the wind. lol

A pic of another lovely couple - both kind and fun!  I knew Dana through Judge Hammers, and Bartley was my favorite OIDS attorney then favorite ADA in Creek County.  

Love and agree with all of this!

Brace yourself... the Jaceman got braces!  He was so excited and Facetimed to show me... then proceeded to play with the rubberbands and forget that I was on the phone. lol  As someone who wore braces for six years (3rd grade to 9th grade), I can say that the fun and glamour fade pretty fast, but I'm glad he's enjoying them for now!!  (And they were worth it in the end.)

❤ ❤ ❤

Hooray for cute new end tables and cute pink baskets!!  =)

That last sentence is one I want to remember!

My physical copy of this book has finally arrived, so I'll be reading it again in February! ❤

A lot of randomness here today, but such is Photo Friday.  

Sending you love and light, and wishing you a sparkly weekend ahead!!  ;-)

Foster Family Celebration! (Thankful Thursday #155)

"'For this child I prayed, and the LORD has granted me my request which I asked of Him.  Now I am giving him to the Lord, and he will belong to the Lord his whole life.' So they worshipped the Lord there."  ~1 Samuel 1:27

Happy Thursday, friends!  Today, I am thankful for...

1.  Getting to celebrate with the Foster family this morning on their official Adoption Day! ❤

2.  Thankful that we all found the right building and made it on time!  (There was some confusion and we all went to the Tulsa County Courthouse before realizing it would be at the Juvenile Center.)

3.  Seeing them so genuinely happy was fantastic and good for the soul!!

4.  Top left = Janet, the woman who connected them with these kids.  Thankful for the part she played in this!  Also, I LOVE all the adoption-themed shirts!!

5.  Thankful that Judge Doss was great, and the courtroom was kid-friendly, and the kids got to pick out fun gifts after the hearing! =)

6.  Thankful for getting to chat with Kristin and Bridget over lunch at Baxter's... and for Jon and Kristin talking a bit about their journey to this moment and their gratitude for their friends and family!

7.  Thankful that they are officially and legally a family of four now!!

8.  Thankful for loving grandparents!  And for Bridget, their DHS caseworker (bottom right) -- I've talked with her several times on the phone as a reference for them, and was happy to meet her in person today!

9.  Super thankful for 15+ years of friendship with Kristin Renee!!  ❤

10.  This has been a long and winding road for over a decade for Jon and Kristin.  (Hope deferred, emotional and physical suffering, confusion, trying multiple routes toward adoption, etc.)   It is clear to me that their faithfulness and obedience over the past decade mattered -- it was not without God-ordained purpose in their lives and in every life they influence.  I'm encouraged by the reminder that God knows what He is doing even when we feel confused about it.  I am so thankful that Jon and Kristin have been an excellent example of waiting well as they have repeatedly chosen to be faithful to God and trusted His goodness and faithfulness to them!  They love and honor God and each other in a way that shines and glorifies Him.  I am sincerely honored to be their friend and thrilled to celebrate this huge milestone with them today!! ❤ 

11.  I'm thankful that I can finally post pictures without worrying about breaking any DHS rules! lol  These two are from my lunch with them way back in July... it makes me smile that the kids look so much like Jon and Kristin! =)

12.  I'm thankful for the myriad of ways God's goodness is evident in their lives, and for this reminder to keep walking in faith and hope!!  (These pics are from April, July, and November.  The kids have been calling them "Mom and Dad" for a while, but it's lovely to know it's official now!)

Yay, God!!  Yay, Fosters!!  Today was wonderful.  I'm praying God continues to bless them abundantly with daily grace and wisdom, a growing support system, and moments of pure joy and fun that strengthen them as they run this unique race God has marked out for them! ❤

Grace...

This = a lovely new faux-flower arrangement Mom made for me!
(Not directly applicable to this post, but a pretty photo so it will have a thumbnail image.)

I feel very aware of my need for God these days... which is a polite way to say that I'm struggling.  And I am reminding myself that it was just over a month ago that I was taking a seemingly final negative pregnancy test days after finding out Mom's cancer was back.  Life doesn't stop for our hard moments, so we moved right on into Christmas and New Years and the surgery and now birthday season and grad school starting back up.  But I am not over it or done processing all of that (and that is normal and okay).

In John Eldredge's podcast this week, he talked about how our spiritual enemy loves to attack us in vulnerable places - that he's a shark who smells blood in the water, and he will never hesitate to kick us when we're already down and an easier target.  And I immediately knew it to be true, and I was grateful for the reminder that there are other forces at play here.  I'm having to work harder lately to focus on truth and push out dark thoughts and fears.  It's jarring when I've been in a good place for so long.  It helps me so much to know it's not just me - that lies are being yelled at me in the spiritual realm - and that I am in the position of spiritual authority over the enemy.  I am not under his rule or bound to his lies in any way!!  With the medication changes, I'm aware that there are likely some physical and hormonal components to this, as well, so I need to have more GRACE for myself all around here.  I've deliberately kept more background noise going lately.  But in the quiet moments, I have felt some intense shame, confusion, loneliness, and age-related doubts about pursuing any of my goals and dreams.  As if I should just give up completely at age 38!?  It's completely absurd when I look at it in the light, but it's a quick spiral when my heart is unguarded.  I just wanted to write and be honest about that struggle this morning.  Especially as my soul is recovering, I need to remember that I'm being targeted by a vicious enemy who knows where I am vulnerable, and I need to pray, stay close to God, seek connection and support and TRUTH, and keep my guard up.

I love verse 5 in the chapter below - the promise that God will satisfy my desires (another translation) and renew my youth.  I am holding on to that today.  God's heart toward me/us is good.  And slow progress is still progress.  More on that later.

"Bless the Lord, my soul, 

and all that is within me, bless His holy name.

Bless the Lord, my soul, and never forget any of His benefits:

He continues to forgive all your sins,

He continues to heal all your diseases,

He continues to redeem your life from the Pit,

and He continuously surrounds you with gracious love and compassion.

He keeps satisfying you with good things,

and He keeps renewing your youth like the eagle’s.

The Lord continuously does what is right,

executing justice for all who are being oppressed...

The Lord is compassionate and gracious,

patient, and abundantly rich in gracious love."

~Psalm 103:1-8

This ISV translation emphasizes that God is continuously at work in our lives.  Compassion, grace, patience, and rich love... four things my heart needs today, and I'm thankful that these qualities describe God's heart toward me!! ❤

Life Update

"And He said to them, Be careful what you are hearing.
The measure [of thought and study] you give [to the truth you hear]
will be the measure [of virtue and knowledge] that comes back to you
– and more [besides] will be given to you who hear."
~Mark 4:24 (AMPC)

I've been thinking about that verse since I heard it in a podcast last week.  God rewards those who sincerely seek Him, and I want to be in that club!  Sometimes I multitask while listening to audiobooks, but I want to work on giving my full attention to God's Word when I listen to the Bible, as well as spending more time with the actual physical book.  I want eyes to see and ears to hear and a heart to walk in truth!  I want to treat God's Word with the reverence and respect it deserves, believing it holds the power to transform me and change the world!

For the past few weeks, I've been going to FBC Moore with Kristin and the Whitaker/Lock family crew!  I've enjoyed being back in church more regularly, and I really like their pastor and feel encouraged by that!  In spite of my hair looking super frazzled, I like this pic of us after church yesterday!

Yes to this... when I think about giving up on the big dreams that scare me, I feel very aware that the quality of my life and my impact on the world would be diminished.  We have to keep choosing courage, friends!!

YOU GUYS, I made a fantastic discovery this weekend... there's a park with a lovely lake and outdoor walking trail about a mile from my house called Central Park, along with a large gym/recreational center called The Station (including an indoor track for rough weather days).  It feels very Crescent Park-esque (my fav walking spot in Tulsa) with cute ducks paddling around and people walking their dogs.  They have fake alligator heads peeking out of the water (freaked me right out) in order to deter geese, which makes me laugh.  Apparently ducks are smarter than geese, because they are undeterred, and that makes me happy!  I'm delighted to know this park/trail/gym exists and to have it so nearby!  And I kinda love the Central Park name, as well (my fav spot in NYC)! ❤

On Friday, I made a down-and-back Tulsa trip to see some of my favorite people!  Sarah made Pioneer Woman chicken enchiladas for us, and I brought bundtinis for dessert.  Me and Sarah and the Wilsons had a good talk whilst the girls played on the mini-trampoline and the living room pillow fort, and Steve and Tate played Star Wars games!  Here is our happy group pic!  ...I do feel a little bad about how much more difficult it is for the parents who have to wrangle their kids when I ask for a group photo, and yet, I also think it's worth the effort! lol

Here's Chet Lee proving he has hazel eyes. lol  Me and Chet and Sarah all have eyes that most would call brown at first glance, but after we looked closely, they all have a bit of green in them too.  Now Kelly Clarkson's "Behind These Hazel Eyes" song feels more personal. lol  (Side note - I wanted blue eyes for the longest time - the color-changing contacts would not work on mine - then Mom said something about my eyes being the same color as Julia Roberts, and I decided my eyes were lovely just as they are and I've been happy with them since.  A silly example, but it's funny how little compliments can make a big impact!)

Katherine Claire repping Hogwarts - cuteness!  Kids in glasses are adorable to me. =)

Reworking the furniture in my living room a bit and centered the tree bridge... now we just have to decide what to do on that back wall!

A photo from our Ted's dinner with Tiffany that I missed in that post!  Jaceman found a random stun-gun app where he presses the button and it makes the loud noise, and it makes him happy! lol  Boys are funny!

I'm thankful that God answers prayers.  My journal prompt this morning was writing about answered prayers over the last month and over the last decade.  It was good timing for me to think about that and remember God's faithfulness - both in the times where I got what I wanted and the times when things didn't work out according to my plan.  He is with us and for us.

We received a mix of good and bad news on Mom... the cancer had not spread to her lymph nodes, but they did find cervical cancer, so she will need radiation treatments for several weeks.  I don't love that, and I don't know exactly what it will look like.  But God is with us and for us.  Praying for wisdom and healing and grace, and that the radiation will hit its target without damaging the healthy surrounding organs.

This has been my worship song of choice to start off the morning the last few days.  
So my song of the week = The Goodness of God by CeCe Winans

"I love Your voice.  You have led me through the fire.

In darkest night, You are close like no other.

I've known You as a Father; I've known You as a friend.

And I have lived in the goodness of God."

❤

Monday Memes!

Happy Monday!!

This one made me think of Sarah, who recently took a very rough Chemistry class to prepare for grad school...

Yes to this... it's tempting to respond to abuse/rejection/mistreatment/feeling weak by doing all we can to toughen up and protect ourselves, sometimes becoming angry and hardhearted and treating others poorly in the process. But vulnerability, kindness, and forgiveness are truly the best and strongest responses!

Yes to commanding respect from others.  Also yes to respecting God enough to truly change rather than repeatedly apologizing for the same sins!

Ha kids are the best with their random thoughts on life!  Also, Will Ferrell playing this guy always cracked me up!

Aww, presh Hare-Bear! lol  I had to laugh at this one!

Lol their expressions make this meme so much better!

I love George! lol  And this feels like an appropriate Monday-ish meme to end on!

That's all for the memes today. =)