Kenneth Switzer Obituary

Kenneth E. Switzer

One of the few good men and genuine cowboys, Kenneth Switzer, age 90, passed away peacefully in his home on Wednesday, August 21, 2019, while holding the hand of LaNell, his devoted wife for over 65 years. 

Kenneth was born on July 27, 1929, in McLean, Texas, the youngest boy in a family with eight children. As a child, he enjoyed bike rides, hunting, and regular family dinners. His father passed away when he was 14, and his mother took a second job so he could complete school. His happiest childhood memory was when two of his older brothers returned home safely from World War II. 

He married LaNell DeBusk on February 17, 1953. Together, they raised daughters LaJo O’Brien and Maxine Muecke. They also helped parent several of their nieces and nephews, including Bryce, Bill, Tonya, and Audie DeBusk, as well as David Wilkinson and Gene Fenton. Kenneth was a strong, loving father and mentor, and when asked for parenting advice, he simply said: “Be consistent in discipline and be sure they know you love them!” 

He was a humble man who believed in the value of hard work and responsibility. Throughout his life, Kenneth was admired and respected by his employers and coworkers. His passion was working with horses including Haskell Bert, Leo Bingo, Canadian Gold, and world champion Tarzan Dude. He was employed as a cowboy and horse trainer, a janitor, a driver for Napa, and the world’s greatest babysitter to his four beloved grandchildren: Lindsey Muecke, Rachael Parrish, Dr. Blake O’Brien, and Emily Schoolcraft. More recently, he also helped care for his first great-grandson, Jace Michael Parrish. One of his highest delights in life was getting to spend time with his prized great-grandchildren: Triston, Carter, Jace, and Kyndal Parrish. 

Kenneth was kind, dependable, and tenderhearted. He served as a regular volunteer at Prarie Vale Elementary where daughter LaJo taught the Preschool Class. He had a profound impact on several students who made great learning progress while gaining a new friend. 

Kenneth was an avid reader who enjoyed walking with friends, playing dominos, working with kids, country dancing, baking his famous chocolate chip cookies, and getting to know the people at Virginia’s Café. He and LaNell have been blessed with many wonderful and dependable friends, including Buster McDaniels, Virginia Smith, and Randi Kaye Huffman, who made caring for Kenneth after his stroke part of their daily routine. 

Although Kenneth Switzer has gone home to be with Jesus, he will not be forgotten here. His life and legacy will continue to impact others for several generations. He was a quiet family man with strong character and a resilient spirit who helped to shape and influence so many lives. He is deeply loved and admired, and he will always be remembered affectionately by his surviving wife, children, nieces and nephews, grandchildren, great grandchildren, and close friends. We were blessed and honored to know him and it is difficult to say goodbye. 

The funeral service is scheduled for 2:00 on Saturday, August 24, 2019, at Barnes and Friederich Funeral Home in Midwest City, Oklahoma. Pastor Bob Rutherford will officiate. In lieu of flowers, donations may be sent to Deer Creek Severe/Profound Special Needs Program, 2601 Northwest 234th Street, Edmond, OK 73025.

*Written by Lindsey Muecke with final editing assistance from Maxine, LaJo, and LaNell.
Official Obituary and Tribute Wall can be found HERE.

Grandad

Yesterday was Grandad's funeral.  There is a lot I want to say, so I'm dividing this into three posts.  This first post is the condensed list of thoughts and memories we gave to Pastor Bob Rutherford for the funeral service. ❤

Kenneth E. Switzer

• Qualities he will be remembered for:  Kind, selfless, humble, hardworking, quiet but friendly, father figure and mentor to many, great with kids, sharp memory and a good story teller, loved others well, tenderhearted, helpful, dependable, strength of spirit!
• Things he loved and enjoyed:  Working with horses (spent years as a cowboy and horse trainer), reading, country dancing, walking with friends, playing dominoes, all things chocolate, getting to know people at Virginia’s Café, babysitting his beloved grandkids and his first great-grandson, Jace.
• When asked about parenting advice, Kenneth responded: “Be consistent in discipline, and be sure they know you love them!”
• We are all thankful Kenneth lived a long, good life and that he is no longer suffering from the effects of the stroke he had in March.  And we rejoice because he knew Jesus as his Savior and is with Him in heaven today!  Saved & baptized at Lincoln Street Baptist Church in Dalhart, Texas.

❤ Chalkboard by Rachael Parrish ❤

• Memories and Stories:  Kenneth volunteered regularly at the school where LaJo was a Preschool teacher.  LaNell, (Kenneth’s wife), said one of his favorite memories was when a student with special needs and disabilities who struggled to speak his own thoughts rather than simply repeating others made huge progress and surprised everyone by saying: “Come on, Grandad!” while they were playing together.
• LaJo, (daughter), said he baked his famous chocolate chip cookies for her to share at the beginning of each school year.  This year was the first year he was unable to do that, and one of the coaches who hadn’t heard about Grandad’s stroke said, “Hey, it’s the first day of school; where’s Grandad’s cookies?”
• Maxine, (daughter), wrote her Dad a heartfelt letter on his last Father’s Day here on earth that ended with:  “We are all so blessed to have you as our Dad, Grandad, Great Grandad, and Husband, and we have benefited so much from your wisdom and steadfast character… EVERYONE who knows you loves you. Throughout my whole life, I have always been so proud of you.  It is my great honor to be your daughter and to call you my Daddy.  I love you more than you could ever know!”
• Lindsey, (oldest granddaughter), remembers asking her Grandad what inspired him to get a dog several years back, and he said he read somewhere that people with dogs live longer.  His wife jokingly asked him, “Well, how long do you wanna live!?” and he quickly and emphatically responded, “Till I die!”  That determined strength of spirit was Lindsey’s favorite thing about him – he stayed active and sharp, and he loved people well and made the most of his time with everyone here on earth!!
• Rachael, (granddaughter), wrote thanking her Grandad for the part he played in her life and saying that she was thankful her children got the opportunity to know him and she hoped her young boys would grow up to be like him!
• A special childhood memory for Lindsey and Rachael is when Grandad surprised them with a decorated Christmas tree the year they lived in an apartment and didn’t think they would get to celebrate their favorite holiday properly.
• Blake, (grandson), talked about how he and Grandad used to spend time at the railroad tracks watching the trains.  Grandad thought Blake might someday work for the railroad, but he became a doctor instead.
• Emily, (youngest granddaughter), posted on Wednesday: “Heaven gained the best man today, but I lost my first best friend!”  When Emily was in fifth grade she didn’t like the school lunches, so Grandad took her cheese pizzas EVERY day and ate lunch with her.
• Audie (Kenneth’s nephew who he helped raise) said he had a strong feeling that he and his brothers and sister should come for a visit last summer.  So the DeBusk kids surprised Kenneth and LaNell by coming in from Colorado, Nebraska, and Nevada to spend a long weekend with their “second parents” in Oklahoma!
• During that visit, Bryce, (nephew), told Kenneth that he didn't know anyone who had done it better as a man, a husband, a father, and a grandfather. He told him he was "like John Wayne" in his eyes, a larger-than-life kind of hero figure.  Kenneth was very touched and the moment felt sacred and special to the family.  Bryce credited Grandad and Babah for helping raise Audie and build him up to be a good man.  He said he wanted to say those things to them because sometimes people wait until it's too late, and you can't tell someone how much they've meant to you after they die.

 The hospital bed where he spent a lot of the past 5 months is empty now, and he is no longer suffering. ❤

• Kenneth was dearly loved and will be deeply missed.  LaNell and the kids and grandkids are deeply thankful for everyone who visited Kenneth and let him know how much they cared for and loved him!  We are especially grateful for the faithful friendship of Buster, Virginia, and Randi Kaye!
• Randi Kaye (good friend who helped care for him in his final days) commented that she would really miss his smile, saying she was sad for our family, but not sad for him because he is in a better place now!

Kenneth Eugene Switzer ❤ July 27, 1929 - August 21, 2019

Bob read every item on the above list, as well as Mom's Father's Day letter from this year and my entire 2009 tribute blog post.  (That was unexpected and made me pretty nervous a few times, but several people said that they felt like they really got to know him better, so I think it was good.)  

They played this song (Somewhere My Love by Red Steagall, the only song Babah specifically requested, one they used to dance the two-step to) during the funeral slideshow, and I loved it.  So to close this post, here is a shorter slideshow I created yesterday with many of the same photos we used during the service, plus a few from yesterday. ❤

Engagement

I love this.

I know most people tend to skim through or speed read my posts for what applies to them and that blogging is not the best platform for me to really feel "heard" and "seen."  I still think there's a lot of benefit in writing to help myself process through things and keep a record of my life story somewhere.  So when I write posts without pictures and quotes, I have low readership expectations but high hopes for personal growth.

I bought a new book this week called Boundaries With Kids.  I bought it to help prepare me for being a parent.  I'm not even halfway through and it is already SO GOOD.  I am currently on the chapter about "the law of sowing and reaping," and I'm realizing I haven't trusted that law the way I should.

I often choose to disengage or choose not to try in life because I don't believe it will be worth it.  I have seen people who make cautious and healthy food choices and exercise regularly receive a terrible medical diagnosis and/or die in a slow and painful manner.  I've seen people who blow off school and drop out of college have massive success while people who strive to better themselves are rejected without cause.  I have watched unhealthy people who make selfish decisions without regard for how their choices affect others float through life while being bailed out of the consequences for their behavior time and time again.  I have seen people who care deeply for others and put their hearts into relationships experience far more rejection, pain, and abandonment than people who keep a comfortable distance and never get too close.  (The level of heartbreak in relational loss always mirrors a person's level of commitment to the relationship, so choosing not to engage in close relationships can seem like the most logical option.)  I'm naturally observant, and I've seen lots of wicked people prospering and even leading while everyone overlooks their character flaws, and I've seen good people struggling and being overlooked and undervalued... and sometimes depression and disengagement are the most natural response in my mind.  Kind of a why bother? mentality.

The main vice of my Enneagram Nine personality style is "sloth," and by that, they mean choosing to slink back and disengage and do what feels most comfortable.  We feel angry about all I mentioned above but we don't want to create conflict, so we choose not to be affected by the outside world as much as possible. #moviesanyone?  Therefore, the key virtue for Type Nines to strive for is "Engagement."  Choosing to step up and not let my own fear, laziness, or inner resentment at all the unfair things I keep seeing stop me from living my own life and making better choices and reaching for what I want.

I think I forget sometimes that the law of sowing and reaping is Biblical.  God says, "Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked.  A man reaps what he sows." (Galatians 6:7)  That changes my perspective entirely to remember that we serve a just God who will judge everyone, the Ancient of Days.  He is able to reward or punish all people in eternity based on what their individual deeds deserve.  So it does matter, and someone is paying attention.  God sees us and He cares, and He is a rewarder of those who sincerely seek Him.

I don't want to be like the man in the parable who hides his talents rather than investing them because he believes the master is unfair and harsh.  I want to engage and invest my life and make healthy choices and trust God with the results.  Even if I do all the work to lose weight and then end up receiving some terrible medical diagnosis, I can still choose my perspective.  It's worth fighting for what is right, even if the payoff doesn't happen here on earth.  I've been trying to convince myself on some of this for years, and this book is helping a lot.  I want to be a person with healthy boundaries and a healthy worldview that acknowledges God's sovereignty AND trusts His goodness.  

I ordered the Boundaries Workbook yesterday and I'm excited about that!  There are so many areas where I'm already aware that I need to set better boundaries, and the book will probably bring more of them to light.  I want to make healthier food choices while maintaining a positive view of my value.  For whatever reason, I don't feel the sense of shame and self-hatred so many overweight people seem to struggle with.  My struggle has never been about putting on a swimsuit in public, but I have struggled with resilient apathy about trying to get healthier, and I want very much to overcome that.  And in the meantime, I want to teach others to treat me with more value and respect.  I've had several overweight friends make negative, cutting comments about themselves where they throw me under the bus with them (trying to connect, perhaps, but it always makes me cringe).  It's a weird form of bullying and trying to pull me down to their level of thinking and it's never been okay with me, and I need to start politely speaking up about that (and a few other things that have become lingering resentments).  

Anyway, lots of jumbled thoughts today, but I'm thankful for the practical lessons in the Boundaries books and I'm excited to work on that in my own life.  I think it will go together well with my desire to be more engaged in life and my desire to adopt eventually! ❤

MM ~ Parent Trap

Happy Monday, gang!  I'm back to work after a week off - I'm happy I can ease into things today because tomorrow will probably be a super-busy felony Tuesday!

Today, I'm going with a classic childhood favorite, The Parent Trap.  I'm not gonna bother saying spoiler alert every time on these.  I loved the Hayley Mills version, the It Takes Two twist, and this Lindsay Lohan version!  I remember being excited seeing this preview in theaters because it said "introducing Lindsay Lohan" and I was psyched about an actress who shared my name (with a different spelling, of course).  Movies like this always made me wish I was a twin - I can definitely see pros and cons to that now.

Anyway, Hallie Parker and Annie James meet at summer camp and are shocked to meet an identical stranger.  They quickly go from arch-nemeses (who pull elaborate pranks that would be 100% impossible for 11-year-olds to pull off) to awesomesauce BFFs when they realize they are twins (whose crazy selfish and immature divorced parents decided to raise them separately and hide the truth from them so the parents wouldn't have to see each other - but we'll ignore that glaring character flaw).  Anyway, they decide to switch places so they can get to know the parent they've missed who forever abandoned them, then they team up to try to get their parents back together!  The girls teach each other about their separate home lives and how to act like the other so that everyone will be fooled, and it's all light and fun and makes the isolation cabin at summer camp look super enjoyable!

Their parents are, of course, both independently wealthy and living super-magical single parent lives... the mom is a hugely successful wedding dress designer in London who has a quirky full-time butler/babysitter, and the dad owns a fantastic vineyard in Napa Valley, California, and has a sassy live-in maid/chef/babysitter.  Unrealistic, yes, but it all makes the movie so much more fun!

It's love at first sight for the girls (whose acting is so on point that neither parent realizes they have picked up the wrong child), but a big problem arises when their dad is unable to see through his painfully transparent gold-digging, way-too-young, beautiful new fiance.  Luckily, he has 11-year-old daughters with more maturity who decide to amp up their parent trap plan and rescue him from his own stupidity!

It's a big shock to everyone when the twins reveal who they are and how they met.  No one apologizes for lying to them for the past decade because that would really mess up the lighthearted tone, but Meredith (the fiance) is understandably horrified by this massive news her fiance failed to share with her, while both parents are super loving and excited to see their girls together again!

The girls try to plan a family camping trip, then their mom tricks Meredith (the fiance) into going in her place.  So the girls pull lots of pranks on "Mer" to try to get their dad to see her clearly.  Anyone who's not outdoorsy and hates lizards and bugs and fears mountain lions is bound to be a child-hating villain, right!? lol It's always been dumb to me that this is how he's finally able to see her true colors.

In the end, of course, their finesse and connivery work out swimmingly!  Their dad comes to his senses and their mom softens a little, and they all get the best of both worlds.  Even the mom's butler and the dad's maid get together for an extra layer of family blendedness. lol  

So yeah, I have to suspend and turn off the hyper-realistic, years-of-family-court-experience part of my brain that knows the prequel to all this would be a terribly selfish and catastrophic decision by the parents (something that's harder when I'm trying to summarize the plot in writing), but I actually do love this movie!  It's lighthearted and warm and fun and has a predictable happy ending!  And I like that it empowers kids to believe their voices matter and can make a positive difference even when their parents really mess things up!

❤

Thankful Thursday (98)

"I will give thanks to You, Lord, with all my heart.

I will tell of all Your wonderful deeds."

~Psalm 9:1

Today, I am thankful for:

1.  Getting to see Hamilton this past weekend with Laura and Susie!  It was fantastic and very worth seeing (and studying the history and memorizing the lyrics). ;-)  "The world will never be the same!"

2.  Getting to hang out with the Moss fam on Monday at a cute new restaurant called Neighborhood Jam! They serve breakfast all day, and I was quite pleased with my French toast choice and J&K loved their breakfast sandwiches!  We got to catch up on life and talk about future Gulf Shores trip possibilities, and I got the awesome stoic vs. smiley pics of JEM and Ellie! =)

3.  Getting my hair done on a whim as a walk-in at Ulta.  I had a brown gloss color put on and had bangs cut... it's much healthier and more natural-looking now, and I'm a fan!  (These pics are after then before bc Google Photos didn't know to switch them. lol)

4.  Celebrating the preshface mini Miss K's 6th birthday yesterday with my first trip to Urban Air then dinner at Pelican's!  Fun facts: Rach wore the earrings she had on in 2013 on Kyndal's actual birth-day (see top right pics below).  And I wore my new pink glasses at the request of the Miss. lol

5.  Not being here all week... huzzah for a staycation!!  Tuesday and today = lazy stay-at-home days with sleeping in, scrapbooking, TV watching, and reading, and I'm loving that!

6.  Having a fun, new (to me) show to watch on Hulu -- White Collar!  I love the cast and the characters and the whole mood of the show.  Neal Caffrey (aka Bryce Larkin from Chuck) has just the right amount of playful arrogance and swagger, not that he needs it when he already looks that good.  And Mozzie, his best friend on the show, is quirky in a way that's hilarious to me.  Anyway, this has been a great summer show to binge watch whilst waiting for all the current shows to come back this fall. =)

7.  And on a less shallow note, I am thankful for the stability God brings to my life.  My eternal hope is firm and secure, and God is always with me and for me... and the more I believe and live that out, the more my peace will be unshakable no matter what my life on earth brings!

Photo Friday!

Happy Friday, friends!! =)

It's been a crazy day in good ol' Creek County!  I've been covering the office this week, but today, I was the only court reporter at work and they called frantically trying to find someone to cover a hearing in Bristow... I made the super-rainy drive down for the 11 o'clock hearing, only to find out there was a traffic docket in front of it, and they broke for lunch before starting the case I was there for.  So I had to reschedule my fun lunch plans and I didn't get back to our office until around 3:30.  Lamesauce!  But I survived and all is well now. =)

And I did get some good worship time in on the drive. Lauren Daigle's CD seemed like a great fit on this rainy day.  *Song of the Week = Rescue by Lauren Daigle

On to Photo Friday goodness...

This meme is so me.  I for sure had a convo with Chettles where I was trying to describe where I was (not to give directions, but to get direction help) and I mentioned all the trees around me. lol

I had to tag Chet and Sarah in this one.  I had no intentions of making new friends when Bobbi put us in the scavenger hunt group together, but I'm very thankful they "adopted" me and have stuck around! lol

Gif of Tater-tot dancing to Baby Shark... the frantic arms with the very tiny foot movement makes me happy! lol

This is my new screensaver.  One of my favorite things about God is His protectiveness, so I love the picture of the Lord being my Shepherd.  Someone I can rest with and feel my soul being restored! ❤

I found this blog post by Joanna Gaines really encouraging...  Giving less than your best in order to self-protect - I get that... the beauty of finding fulfillment when you start to show up and step up and stop hiding - I want that! ❤

I returned to Planet Fitness this week and got cracked up when I saw that it was Pizza Monday! lol

Kelly texted me this pic of JEM saying hi whilst watching Bachelor in Paradise. LOL

I've been playing catch-up with scrapbooking this week, starting with 2015.  (I'm nearly done with 2016 now and I have next week off to work on it a bit, too.)  Anyway, yay for fun Florida trip memories! =)

And for this tiny preshface!!  Mmmmmini Miss K.  Gaaah, so freaking cute!  This was Christmas morning when she put on some shoes to match her new doll and was feelin' cute and funny about it! ❤❤

I scrapbooked some fun Big Cedar memories yesterday, and I found myself wishing it was winter and I was in a cozy cabin with friends playing Nertz! lol

This pic will always make me laugh... this box caught fire while sitting on top of the hot oven, and Sarah was the only one who took quick action to put it out and was annoyed we didn't jump in to help her!  My brain doesn't move fast enough in emergencies... I did think to snap a photo, though. lol

And there was this lovely note from Chet Lee when he shared words of encouragement with all of us at his bday party in 2015, thus redeeming himself from the earlier Juwanna Mann tragedy. lolol

Anywho, lots of reminiscing over fun memories and things I feel thankful for!  

And in the future fun column, TOMORROW I GET TO SEE HAMILTON!!  I'm super excited, and I feel thankful that I became a fan a few months before the play came to Oklahoma rather than a few months after that!  I'll let ya know how it goes.  Just you wait! ;-)

That's all I've got today.  Make it a fantastic weekend, and I'll see you again soon! ❤

Birthdays Weekend!

January/February and July/August seem to be the main birthday season months for most of my family and friends!!  This weekend, we celebrated Grandad's 90th birthday at Virginia's Cafe. Note the awesome sign Rach made behind Dad!

Hanging out with Triston and Carter is fun times.  I like these ages and the deeper questions they will ask, and their sibling rivalry kinda cracks me up!

Grandad's friend, Buster, has come to visit him almost every day since his stroke (which was 5 months ago today).  I'm thankful for that, and I'm feeling so aware of the importance of dependable people who care enough to show up and speak up!

Here's Sam and Gene admiring the fun cowboy cake from Rosebeary's Bakery (YUM!)  It's supposed to be Me, Rach, Blake, and Emily under the name "Grandad." =)

Pretty Miss Ray (who I call "Moose" for reasons unknown) hanging out with me and Mom on their new outdoor couch while we watched the kids swim and chatted with Bill and Donna!

Bill is Mom's favorite cousin and Donna is his wife.  They drove from Colorado to be here for Grandad's birthday this weekend!  They're both nice and fun, and it was good getting to spend some time with them. ❤

Group selfie! lol

Silly faces... mine was accidentally cropped out here, so Miss K made me demonstrate a silly face just for her. lol

J&K sat with us in "big church" on Sunday.  Craig started a new series on anxiety, and I loved the reminder of God's voice being a gentle whisper because He is NEAR. ❤

We celebrated Grandad's birthday a week late... on Dad's actual birthday.  So we celebrated Dad's birthday a day late on Sunday.  We had lunch at Ted's with Charlene, the Myricks, Bill & Jill, and J&K.  Here's Dad opening his gift from Bill, which Jill called "the dumbest gift ever!" lolol

He painted some orange on this tiny car and wrote the OSU, saying he thought Dad deserved a convertible. lol  His gifts and cards always make me laugh!

Bill showing Kyndal the video of bears catching fish. =)  Charlene and I chatted with Bill and Jill about the 2020 Alaska cruise!  Only a year and a month away! lol

After lunch, the adults went to see Hobbs and Shaw, which was exactly as over-the-top ridiculous and crazy fun as I expected! =)  Jace was very persistent in wanting to go see Charlene's birds, so we stopped there for a few minutes.

Then we had dinner at Rib Crib, where Jace talked about wanting a rainbow parakeet all night and the Miss asked me to make her some cute glasses.  Mission accomplished!  =)

And now here we are on Monday.  I'm covering the office at work this week, but it should be pretty light and fluffy.  I started working on a new scrapbook today that will cover 2015-2018, so that'll be interesting to narrow down.  Wish me luck!

Happy Monday, friends!  Hope you have a fantastic week!!