Thankful Thursday #183!

"Yes, you will be enriched in every way
so that you can always be generous.
And when we take your gifts to those who need them,
they will thank God."
~2 Corinthians 9:11

Today, I am thankful for:

1.  Another fun volleyball tournament with the ladies of the fam (Tulsa Big Show last weekend).  Watching the Mini Miss K be the libero and the team captain standing up for her team with her favorite ref (sarcasm) was entertaining and good times, and the fact that she served the game-winning points two days in a row makes me happy!! ❤

2.  Mom and I also got to make a last-minute stop at Amber Marie, which was all decked out for Spring!  I'll be popping by there again next weekend to grab the rosy check (Mackenzie Childs' latest pink-and-white check pattern) spoon rest. =)

3.  Rach and Kyndal also stopped by Amber Marie, where Kyndal got not one or two, but 12+ colorful gel pens that she is very proud of and excited about!! lol  Mom and I had the privilege of seeing them individually on a FaceTime call and then again in person at our family dinner Monday night (which K called to personally invite me to).  The fact that she randomly wrote "Kyndal Faith Parrish - Yehaww Cowboy!" to demonstrate her double-sided pens made my whole Monday. lol

4.  Marla sharing her eclipse glasses with me (Mom bought fancy ones on Amazon but forgot to give them to me last weekend, but Marla came to the rescue).  I got to see it several times while hanging out with Aislan, Victoria, Marla, Melissa, and Pam (pictured below)...  Next viewing in 2045!

Adorable. lol This makes me like the moon more.

5.  Addiction and Grace by Gerald May... it takes me forever to read real physical books these days, but this one is really great and I'll have more to say about it later.  For now, the gentle reminder that we need to stay the course and be vigilant about the sins that easily entangle us is well-timed and appreciated!

6.  Equally as well-timed and welcomed is this morning's reminder that God is not surprised by our shortcomings, and He has new mercy and new strength for us today... and Beth's encouragement to take the opportunities God puts in front of us!

7.  This happy throwback Thursday pic from April 2023, celebrating Easter at the Wilson home with longer-hair Chettles and friends! =)

8.  For Kristin texting me to check in last night - yay for good friends who know the details and care and support us through hard seasons!  My talks with Mom, Kristin, Chet, and Sarah all helped me process a big disappointment followed by a new opportunity and cautious optimism last week.  But yes, currently fighting off a cold and feeling worn down as this semester slowly draws to a close, so pray for strength to finish strong next week!

9.  Yay for Sophie announcing her new book... I love it when my podcast friends share book titles or book news that makes me smile because I feel like I know the inside story.  And I feel like this will be well-timed as I'm taking the NCE this fall and preparing to move into a legit counseling career!

10.  Fun Group Projects! ("No, not really.  I can't back that up.")  But this group was truly better than most as everyone did their part well, and career development feels interesting and relevant to me, and I'm thankful our hard work is done now!  YAY for only two semesters left in this program (Summer and Fall 2024).  We've got this!!!

Happy Thursday!
❤

Total Eclipse (Monday Memes)

Happy Monday, and happy Total Eclipse day!  I've had the song in my head all afternoon, so that's a treat.  Without further ado, here are some delightful memes in honor of today's eclipse. =)

I like this cute, playful version of the moon! lol

Well played, Voudoux.

Not eclipse related, just very applicable to my life.

#bovered

Jess and Nick both make compelling arguments here - I feel both sides of this!

Golden Corral, CiCi's Pizza, Taco Cabana

#Introverts

Saving the best for last... this one still cracks me up.  So much drama in that song, and it was definitely a high school favorite riding with Megs, Holly, and Rach!

"Once upon a time, I was falling in love - 

Now I'm only falling apart.

There's nothing I can do...

TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART!!"

❤

Run with Endurance

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up.  And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.  We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.  Because of the joy awaiting Him, He endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now He is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.  Think of all the hostility He endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up...  Watch out for the Esau syndrome: trading away God’s lifelong gift in order to satisfy a short-term appetite.  You well know how Esau later regretted that impulsive act and wanted God’s blessing - but by then it was too late, tears or no tears...  Be careful that you do not refuse to listen to the One who is speaking.  For if the people of Israel did not escape when they refused to listen to Moses, the earthly messenger, we will certainly not escape if we reject the One who speaks to us from heaven!  ...Since we are receiving a Kingdom that is unshakable, let us be thankful and please God by worshiping Him with holy fear and awe.  For our God is a consuming fire."

-Hebrews 12 ❤

That's the chapter Annie spoke about at Crosspoint today.  It's all powerful, and the Esau verse always gets me.

And here are a few memes I've saved over the last couple days...

That's all for now.

Hope you got to rest and recharge today!  

Happy Sunday.

❤

The Stories We Tell Ourselves

Some old internal narratives, and a healthier reframe...

1. The Story I've Been Telling Myself:  I’m afraid to say that I want marriage... Part of me sees it as believing I am not enough without a man, and I wholeheartedly resist that sense of inferiority.  I've also been too needy in the past and I want to avoid that moving forward.
   STORY UPGRADE:  I want a good marriage, and I. am. worthy. of. a. good. marriage.  It is not a grand prize God reserves for those who have their entire lives together.  There is *nothing* wrong, shameful, weak, needy, pathetic, ridiculous, or insecure about desiring/pursuing a healthy romantic relationship.  I am whole and complete -- I know who I am in Christ, and part of who God designed me to be is a woman with a high relational capacity who loves deeply, desires committed connection, and thrives in safe, close relationships. ❤  
   
   
2. The Story I've Been Telling Myself:  Another part of me fears losing my hard-won sense of identity, putting the guy on a pedestal, and morphing into the relationship the way I did in the distant past.  
   STORY UPGRADE:  In a thousand ways, I am not the woman I used to be, and I don't need to live in fear of reverting back into her.  I have good friends who care enough to call out unhealthy behaviors.  I have grown and changed and made wonderful progress over time, and I will continue to learn, dream, and grow with God... and potentially with a spouse.  I trust that the same would be true for my future husband. ❤
   
   
3. The Story I've Been Telling Myself:  Online dating is hard and awkward, and getting my hopes up in this department feels scary when the odds feel increasingly stacked against me here.  
   STORY UPGRADE:  I firmly believe there are wonderful Christian single men in the world, and that God knows how to connect us if I really open myself to that possibility and pray for His direction and timing.  The natural odds are irrelevant to Jesus, and in fact, He specializes in working with people most of the world has written off as too old or not good enough.  So whether it is children or marriage or a thriving counseling practice or a book that changes lives or some combination of all of that, I'm saying yes to everything God desires to give me in this life.  And I trust His heart toward me, with faith that He will protect me, give me wisdom, and open new doors for me here if and when the timing is right. ❤
   
   
4. The Story I've Been Telling Myself:  Internally, I've made agreements with the idea that marriage will never happen for me, and I've sometimes sinfully justified reading/watching inappropriate content based on my suspicion that God is withholding real human intimacy from me.
   STORY UPGRADE:   I would love to play an important role in a vibrant and healthy Christian marriage, and that is not the impossible dream.  God values me and views me with love and favor, and He is NOT punishing me or withholding anything good from me.  God is calling me to walk in higher integrity and obedience, and He is eager to give me good things that will meet my heart's desires and benefit my future and glorify Him.  I am repentant and prioritizing a clean conscience and setting up better accountability, and I will prayerfully break the agreements I have made with the enemy about relationships and/or my ability to add value to a marriage.  So I am praying for guidance, avoiding unhealthy secrets, and giving men a real chance - understanding that all relationships take work, and no one is perfect! ❤
   
   
5. The Story I've Been Telling Myself: The major scars of rejection in my past make it easy to put up self-protective walls and to judge new relationships too quickly.
   STORY UPGRADE:  The enemy has lied to me for many years here, and I've been vulnerable to those lies and sometimes done a poor job of fighting back with truth.  But I am not unlovable or broken or unfit for marriage or too messy or destined for rejection or best tolerated in small doses.  I am growing, and I am good at relationships, and I love people well and add value to their lives.  And I believe God will empower me to move forward with more confident hope, peace, and clarity of desire!
   
   
6. The Story I've Been Telling Myself:  Motherhood matters more to me than marriage, and I am pretty good at navigating life on my own.  It would be too complicated and difficult to change the relational dynamic at this point.
   STORY UPGRADE:  Becoming a mom is a lifelong dream for me, and I will walk through the doors God chooses to open in the adoption journey (currently on my second Snowflakes embryo adoption match)!  Pursuing motherhood initially felt safer to me, as I believed that was more within my control and less likely to lead to feelings of rejection (wrong on both counts).  God is with me and for me, changing my heart a little along, and thus far, I believe He is not telling me to give up on either of these dreams.  Whether my future role involves being a content single woman, a wonderful single parent, a devoted wife, or a wife and mom, God will give me the grace I need to live the life He is calling and leading me into! ❤
   
   
7. The Story I've Been Telling Myself: Many of the married mothers I know seem a bit stressed, anxious, and in need of more support.  I worry about feeling very isolated and overwhelmed if/when I become a mom.
   STORY UPGRADE:  Every person alive has moments of feeling alone or overwhelmed - I know how to navigate that as a single woman, and God would be with me and give me grace as a single parent for as long as that is my role.  I have wonderful support, and I have the power to seek help and to intentionally build/maintain a  solid community of family, friends, mentors, etc.  I have a God-given spirit of power, deep love, and a sound mind, so I will not let fear be the thing that stops me from pursuing my God-given desires and goals! ❤

*Post inspired by Ally Fallon's Write Your Story podcast.  Don't settle for the rough draft or keep repeating an old story you feel stuck in.  Each of us have the opportunity to make internal edits and to level up in the way we frame and narrate our own life story, and IT MATTERS!!! ❤

Photo Friday!

Miss Kyndal Faith front and center with her Charge volleyball teammates... Faye, Sania, Ava, Taylor, Emma, Kennedy, and Ariel! 

The cheesiness of these fire pics is fantastic.

Fierce!

And fun!!

Yay for a full team photo with the coaches!

A good visual for what we all know to be true.

Yay, Kelly Clarkson for this tweet several years back that set T-Swift on the path to loads of extra $$ and owning her own songs (Taylor's Version)!

Truth.  Sharing vulnerable things we've kept hidden is difficult.  The finding people who respond with empathy and understanding was trickier for me, but I'm getting better at both, and feeling more and more free!

Focus on the inner circle.

God places a high value on your life.

Don't give other people the power to change how you see that.

❤

It's me, internally celebrating Christmas all year long! =)

Truth... some AI help with cleaning, laundry, and dishes would be very welcome. lol

The cookies-n-cream Hershey is pretty good, though!

My next car.  (Maybe). lol  I love the copper!

Happy Friday, friends and fam!!

❤

Thankful Thursday #182

"For the LORD God is a sun and a shield;

the LORD gives grace and honor;

He withholds no good thing

from those who walk with integrity."

~Psalm 84:11 ❤

Today, I am grateful for:

1.  A lovely Easter Sunday at Life.Church + lunch with the fam!

2.  This precious pic and memory from April 1st, 2012. =)  And for Triston Michael, who turned 17 on Tuesday!!

3.  The Myers fam (celebrating Sophia's 4th birthday here).  I'm thankful for their friendship and for their story, which has helped me feel less alone or singled out with the long adoption waiting process.

4.  The Fulton fam - Steve's birthday was also on Tuesday, and the pic of Kate with the Easter egg confetti in her hair just makes me happy!  My friends have the cutest kids!! ❤

5.  Easter egg hunt cuteness + Parker's deep love of queso! lol

6.  Getting to catch up a bit with Jeffrey Edward and Kelly Marie and Sarah Young over a fun Easter cookout!

7.  Helping Parker Elizabeth down the big slide - she's a delight!

8.  Our Easter group pics (taken after the Young and Jensen families left).  ❤

9.  This pic of my wonderful guy friends and their sons (only missing Mark and Harvey who hadn't arrived yet).  Chet may have mocked me for insisting on this posed candid, but I'm gonna say it was worth it! lol

10.  The verse at the top feels significant to me today.  Integrity matters deeply to God, and His heart is to give good things to His children... both of which are great reminders I need right now!  I'm thankful that His grace is sufficient for each of us based on what we are going through today. 

❤