Day 17 ~ Extremes

Today = My highs and lows from the past year

A lot happens in a year, and there are definitely more highs than lows this year, so I'm thankful for that truth!  Sometimes an event is marbled together in my mind where a low is mixed with a high (like laughing and talking with Mom and JB during Babah's shoulder surgery yesterday, which went very well).

In very ironic news, exactly one year ago today, I wrote about being thankful that what they thought might be a stroke for Grandad was actually NOT a stroke (HERE).  I had honestly forgotten about that and was surprised when I read it this morning.  What's amazing about that is that all this could have happened a full year ago, but instead, he got to be healthy and whole for ten more months, including the DeBusk fam coming for a surprise visit to celebrate with him this summer... and seeing his cookie recipe in the DeBusk Family Cookbook and celebrating Christmas Eve with all of us... and lots of other ordinary, everyday moments of playing dominoes and eating at Virginia's Cafe and watching his great-grandkids play!  And that makes me feel very thankful!! ❤

Past Year HIGHS (click for link on any of them):

• Celebrating Miss K's 5th birthday with a family trip to Grand Lake!
• The DeBusk fam reunion weekend!
• Dad's 65th Birthday celebration!
• Christmas Eve and Christmas with the fam!
• Going all out decorating my house for Christmas with Mom (and Tiffany)!
• My Meredith Grey resilience revelation! =)
• Super Bowl Sunday!
• Finding Evergreen Church!
• Birthday trip to Vegas with Tiffany, Sarah, and Steve!
• Walking the OKC Half with Dad!
• Finally getting to swim in Mom and Dad's new pool!

Past Year LOWS:

• Dealing with NCRA's idiocy as I paid loads of money to maintain a certificate I earned 15 freaking years ago
• Grandad's stroke in March and the chain of events that followed, including a couple wheelchair falls, and now Babah's health issues
• Continuing to feel disappointed in the thinning pool of single Christian men
• Continuing to feel discouraged by the way the church treats single women
• Learning that the average cost of domestic adoption is $38,000 + knowing everything I know about the DHS foster/adoption process + trying to discern how to move forward from here
• Seriously contemplating pregnancy (Google searching sperm donors and all kinds of other questions), then deciding it's probably best that I not do that alone because I want to be a strong, emotionally stable mother... and dealing with pregnancy emotions and possible complications, loss, and/or postpartum depression without a very tangible, dependable, constant support system is likely a very poor idea for someone with my specific personality and depression history

So there are definitely some struggles and questions in play, but God has been gracious to me, and it has been a really good year, all things considered!  The new challenges require us to lean on God and trust Him in new ways, and it's not fun, but it's growth that builds resilience and strength... so basically, I'm thankful for the highs and the lows and all the very ordinary days in between!! ❤